Daily Archives: August 23, 2014

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL?

Manziel Redskins

Well, so much for the Johnny Manziel experiment… at least for now.

After Monday night’s poor performance by both Manziel and Brian Hoyer in their QB competition against the Redskins, Browns head coach, Mike Pettine, named Hoyer as the regular season starter.

“BUT WHY?” ~ All the naive Cleveland Browns fans who purchased Manziel jerseys!

How does a freakishly athletic midget with oversized hands, whose two most talked about performances last year at Texas A&M resulted in losses, get beat out by a dude 7 years his senior, coming off of, and prolly not fully recovered from, ACL surgery?

It’s quite simple, actually. Manziel can’t comprehend the game played in the NFL.

In college, Manziel didn’t have a playbook; didn’t have to huddle to call plays. I believe the coaching staff just held up pictures on the sideline to call plays. A picture of a rainbow meant WRs GO LONG while a picture of a roadrunner prolly just told Johnny to run like hell!

I don’t care if it’s highly lucrative NCAA football, it’s still backyard football that Manziel played. The national media anointed him “Johnny Football.” The Browns, and their batshit crazy owner, Jimmy Haslam, were stupid enough to pick him 22nd in the draft.

After months of partying in Vegas and snorting coke off strippers asses post draft, Manziel showed up at training camp and was overwhelmed by the intricate playbook of Browns offensive coordinator Kyle Shanahan. While the Browns might run a no huddle offense here and there, the majority of their plays thus far have come out of the huddle. Word around town is that Manziel struggled calling the sometimes 18 word plays in the huddle, oftentimes assisted by teammates to get the play called.

That incompetence won’t fly in the NFL and definitely not against Pittsburgh for our season opener only 15 days from now.

I believe there are three reasons Brian Hoyer was named the Browns starting QB:

  1. Dude spent the offseason rehabbing from ACL surgery while working hard on learning the playbook.
  2. Cleveland only won 4 games last year, two of which were engineered by Hoyer, against Minnesota and Cincinnati.
  3. Hoyer has enough NFL experience that he understands a pro style offense.

In my opinion, the only reason Hoyer has looked horrible so far this preseason, and in training camp, is because of the QB competition. Splitting reps merely dilutes the quality of play. There is no continuity. I know… that applies to Manziel too, but he still can’t read the playbook!

Hopefully all of that is changed now that we have named a starter. Hoyer can make all the reps with the starters and develop consistency and chemistry with the rest of the offense.

Tonight will be a huge test for that with the St. Louis Rams coming to town. Here’s what I’ll be looking for:

  1. Confidence by Hoyer. Maybe some first downs here and there!
  2. WRs looking for the ball!
  3. WRs CATCHING the fucking ball!

I believe Cleveland’s defense is a top three unit! All we need is for the offense to carry their part of the load and string together some long drives!

I know… this is a preseason game. Don’t care, though, because it’s the “dress rehearsal” for the regular season.

GO BROWNS!!!

Public Humiliation Diet ~ Round 2!

Chicken Fries

Son of a bitch… here we go again, folks! The fatty is back after falling off the wagon! I knew I was gaining weight for months but I just got lazy. Yeah, even throughout the summer months with so much stuff going on with the kids and all the running around, I managed to gain 37 freakin’ pounds since I completed the first round of dieting.. chronicled below.

This is merely a minor setback; happens to a lot of people. After workin’ kinda hard to lose 58 pounds, I just stopped dieting. Stopped exercising.

The last straw this time was the button popping off a couple pairs of shorts. I had to sew them back on. I despise sewing! I’m not gonna sew any more!

No more Burger King Chicken Fries, or any other fast food for that matter! Water will replace pop, even diet pop! Beer? Hmmmm…. The NFL season starts in 12 days, so who knows…

I know I’m not gonna work kinda hard this time to get down to around 175. That shit took like 10 months. I want to hit that goal by Christmas, so that means 4 months! Gonna have to bust my ass!

This morning I removed all the laundry from the ol’ treadmill, dusted it off, gave it a quick tuneup and fired it up. I managed to walk a mile, at an 8% incline in 20 minutes before I began to feel heart failure setting in. Embarrassing, I know! I had to start somewhere, though!

So here goes! Current fatty status: 210 sweaty pounds!

Related Posts:

Day 298 ~ 173 Lbs. Mission Accomplished!
Day 235 ~ 182 Lbs.
Day 192 ~ 187 Lbs.
Day 162 ~ 193 Lbs
Day 143 ~ 197 Lbs.
Day 125 ~ 200 Lbs. WOO HOO!
Day 113 ~ 204 Lbs.
Day 25 ~ 220 Lbs. via pizza rolls…
Day 5 ~ 225.4 Lbs. The nutrition plan…
Day 3 ~ 231.8 Lbs. WTF??
Day One ~ And so it begins ~ 231 Lbs.