Sexy Saturday Goes Hi-fi!

I’ve been slacking a bit lately…. missed Sexy Saturday last week because I was spending time with some of my favorite women! I missed Hi-fi Friday yesterday because, again, I was spending time with one of my favorite women!

When I was a little boy I told my Mom that, one day, I want to be surrounded by beautiful women… I have achieved that with my three beautiful daughters, my beautiful Diane in PA and her three beautiful daughters! Don’t get me wrong… each and every one of them drive me crazy at times, but they all bring out the best in me!

Now let’s move on to some women who drive me crazy as well; but in a different way, because they won’t answer my emails in which I ask them out! Welcome to a combination of sorts… a Hi-fi Sexy Saturday…

Here’s Shania Twain!

Shania was one of the first female country artists that caught my eye…

… I’m not sure why, however.. Must be those socks!

Anyway, here’s one of her big hits from 1997… one that I couldn’t exactly sing out loud while runnin’ around the auto parts store I worked at…

~ Man! I Feel Like A Woman ~

As the video progresses, she removes layers of clothing. It’s mesmerizing!

I never really got into American Idol… until its fourth season when this girl named Carrie Underwood started lightin’ shit up!

I was hooked and watched the show through it’s finale, that Carrie won! Pretty in pink, eh?

She also does the bikini thing well….

Mmmmmmmm…. Well, shortly after I took that picture, she started dating the chokey, whiney, pussy QB of the Dallas Cowboys, Tony Romo.

I imagine that’s right around the time she stopped enjoying meat became a vegan!

Carrie ended up marrying some hockey player…

She is a hell of a live performer, however. In this next video, she’s onstage with the legendary Steven Tyler of Aerosmith and holds up just fine…

~ Undo It & Walk This Way ~

… though Steven doesn’t seem to do to well. I think he wants to do it with her right on stage… Who wouldn’t? Did you SEE her legs?

Here’s another look from a different performance:

DAYUM!

Y’all gotta remember that I’m sort of new to this country music thang… So I really didn’t know who Miranda Lambert is until I saw her in the beginning of Blake Shelton’s God Gave Me You.. She’s definitely worth checking out!

I was also exposed to Miranda in one of her recent singles, the video featuring NASCAR’s Danica Patrick…

~ Fastest Girl In Town ~ 

Every time I watch that video I hope that it’ll change and Miranda and Danica will start making out! They never do; not even a friendly boob squeeze! Oh yeah, Danica might be the fastest girl in town, but put her on the track with 42 boys and they run circles around her. Literally.

Speaking of NASCAR and women, all we ever hear about is Danica Patrick. Did you guys know that there’s a woman who’s on a pit crew in the truck series? Her name’s Christmas Abbott and she’s a front tire changer. That’s right… at 5′ 3″ and 115 pounds, Christmas is ripping 60 pound tires off a racetruck!

And here she is!

She’s sort of fit…

Am I right?

You could bounce lug nuts off that ass! Ha ha! Loogit the other crew members checkin’ her out…

Check out this video…

She’s quite impressive and I hope she moves up to the more popular series!

A little too chiseled for me, however, so I’ll have to pass, Christmas. Sorry!

Let’s move on to someone a little softer, shall we? Like Jessie James…

Honestly, I didn’t know who she was until this morning; but I’m glad I’ve discovered her!

I like how she sort of uses the concept from Van Halen’s Hot For Teacher in this one..

~ My Cowboy ~

Hoo boy! Giddyup, Giddyup, GO is right!

Alright… last one here… This girl guy I work with, Dustin, recommended that I look up Jana Kramer a few months back. She He said she’d definitely be worthy of Sexy Saturday, and boy was she he right!

Good call Dustin!

I like her style in this one… She’s just so damn happy and bouncy!

~ What I Love About Your Love ~

I must be going, but before I do, here’s one for the ladies and men who like men Dustin. Aaron Lewis!

~ Forever ~

Enjoy the rest of your weekend folks!

Sexy Saturday! Splish Splash I was takin’ a Bath…

I’ve heard on several occasions how fun shower sex is. A good way to multitask, perhaps? I tend to agree, though shower sex would prolly be much more fun with someone in there with me!

Now I’m not so sure about bathtub sex. It doesn’t seem to promote good hygiene, ya know, splashing around in a bunch of, well, suds!

The bathtub is a good environment, however, to utilize strategically placed bubbles in a seductive manner! Let’s take a look, shall we?

This is a good start! I like me some redhead…

… Oooh you’re gonna blow those bubbles at me? Keep going!

Ahhhhh! Then ya stand up and appear to be wearing a diaper! This is a bathtime fun fail! Too much bubbles girl! Let’s see how the professionals do it… Here’s Bree Olson..

Bree knows how to use just enough bubbles! Here she is applying them…

Like I said, a pro… literally!

Here’s another bathtime fun fail…

No bubbles, just unfortunately cloudy water. No smile… See what dating Chris Brown does to a girl…

The damn water is too cloudy to see her ass… and what the fuck happened to her hair? Holy shit, she needs more than a bath!

Here’s the proper way to present the ass in the tub, Rihanna…

Puh POW!

Even Mariah Carey fails at bubble bath etiquette…

Ya don’t bring the fuckin’ dog into the bath! That’s just gross…

Oh well… that’s about it for now… I gotta go take a quick shower anyway… So here’s a quick submission for the ladies and men who like men…

That’s Adam Pally, aka Max, of Happy Endings fame!

Enjoy the rest of your weekend, folks!

Sexy Saturday ~ NASCAR Edition!

The NASCAR theme continues here at For Shiggles with the Daytona 500 only 24 hours away!

To dispel the myth that NASCAR is comprised of individuals who are regularly featured at http://www.peopleofwalmart.com, let’s take a look at some of the wives and girlfriends of the drivers, shall we?

Let’s start with the most notorious publicized, Ricky Stenhouse Jr.’s girlfriend, fellow driver and pole sitter for tomorrow’s race, Danica Patrick!

Danica has spent more time in front of a camera than she has on the lead lap!

Who wants to bet she’s involved in a wreck tomorrow within the first 5 laps?

Jeff Gordon has a knack for scoring serious tail! Here he is pictured with his first wife, Brooke…

And after Brooke divorced him for being too short, he moved on to the taller, model-y-er Ingrid Vandebosch…

Alright… how about something a bit more sexy, Ingrid, and with less Jeff…

That’s more like it!!

Now Kyle Busch is a fantastic race car driver, but a huge dork! He does pretty well in the girly department…

That’s Kyle and his wife Samantha… Check out how nicely she cleans up!

Hoo boy!

Here’s Denny Hamlin and his girlfriend, Jordan Fish..

Jordan is a former Charlotte Bobcats cheerleader, so…

… she’s pretty hot too!

Carl Edwards is married to Dr. Kate Downey…

Yes, Kate’s a doctor. And a hot doctor at that! So he prolly doesn’t miss his ex-girlfriend, Olympic swimmer Amanda Beard…

I saved the best for last here, folks! AJ Allmendinger used to be a NASCAR driver, but he got busted for failing a drug test last year. Turns out it was Adderall, and he went through the drug program to get reinstated and WAS reinstated, but I don’t believe he’s racing in NASCAR this year… here’s a shot of him and his wife, Lynne Kushnirenko..

And here’s more Lynne….

Damn!

Well I got nothin’ for the ladies… actually… here’s Jeff Gordon at the beach…

… There ya go for all you Hobbit fans!

Enjoy the rest of your weekend, folks!

Sexy Saturday! Another One Bites the Dust…

Ya know what? ABC can go burn in hell. About a month ago they announced the cancellation of one of my favorite sitcoms, Don’t Trust the B—- in Apartment 23.

Then last week, they effectively announced the cancellation of my other favorite sitcom, Happy Endings.

It isn’t cancelled, per se, but ABC is trying their hardest to torpedo the show. Recently, they moved it to Sunday nights, airing double episodes to try and kill it. That didn’t work, so now they’re gonna move it to Friday nights, starting March 29th. Friday nights are where sitcoms go to die…

Why are they moving it now?

So they can air some stupid show called Celebrity Wife Swap. Ya know who’s gonna be featured on this season of Celebrity Wife Swap? Kate Gosselin…

I apologize for the lack of sexy here…

… wait. WHAT? She ain’t even a wife! After that whole Jon and Kate plus 8 debacle, Jon & Kate got a divorce so now she’s a single mother. So what’s the swap? I guess Kate is gonna spend time with former Eagles/Colts/Vikings WR Hank Baskett and in return, Hank’s wife, Playboy model Kendra Wilkinson, will spend time with Kate’s 8 kids…

This hardly seems fair to Hank, who has to give up this…

… for this…

Damn… that show’s not gonna be funny at all… I see it as a chronicle of the road to Hank’s suicide, which will then be blamed on concussions from playing football and not Kate Gosselin!

So that crap is gonna replace Happy Endings which is sort of like that old sitcom Friends… except Happy Endings is funny! And sexier!

No more Elisha Cuthbert as Alex Kerkovich?

Maaaake Ooooouuut!

 

 

… and no more Eliza Coupe as Jane-Kerkovich-Williams…

 

Or Casey Wilson as Penny Hartz?

And now, for the ladies and men who like men, I present the guys from Happy Endings…

Zachary Knighton as Dave Rose… GONE!

 

 

The extremely hilarious Damon Wayans Jr. as Brad Williams…. SEE YA!

 

I’ve saved the best for last here… Adam Pally plays Max Blum on Happy Endings…  He is, by far, my favorite character on the show and, in my opinion, the most hilarious gay character on TV.

 

 

I hate to see this show go away… I’ve got no clue what ABC is thinking by trying to kill it…

Gotta go, folks! Enjoy the rest of your weekend!

Sexy Saturday ~ Valentine’s Day!

Sometimes I struggle to come up with ideas for Sexy Saturday. Thank God for reader Elaine’s input! She reminded me that Valentine’s Day is coming up next week and I should make that the theme for today… So Valentine’s Day it is!

My thoughts on the “holiday?” It’s stupid! Whatever it’s origins, all it is today is a boon for confectioners…

… condom manufacturers, restaurateurs, florists, Hallmark, lingerie stores, lubricant manufacturers, and dildo salesmen!

Wanna know how stupid it is to me? Last time I “celebrated” Valentine’s Day was in 2006 when I sent my wife flowers in an effort to sort of apologize for leaving town for a week for the Daytona 500…

DAMN was I skinny seven years ago! L to R… Myself, Jimmy, Tony, Jason and Brian.

…When I called to find out if she was excited about the flowers she blew me off. Hmmm… OH, she got the flowers, but it turns out that some other dude was giving her something else while I was 975 miles away. That’s why I’m single now… I oftentimes wonder if that dudes marriage was also destroyed back then…

FUCK Valentine’s Day…. I got pissed off reliving all of that bullshit, so here’s some sexy to cleanse the palate…

And for the ladies and men who like men…

Enjoy the rest of your weekend, folks!

Sexy Saturday ~ Goodbye and HELLO!

 

 

Broadcasting today from For Shiggles’ remote location in tropical nipply Hanover, PA…

Man… a couple weeks ago, the idiots at ABC cancelled one of their best sitcoms ever, Don’t Trust the B—- in Apartment 23. Somehow, stupid shows like The Bachelor or Dancing with the Stars can survive, but not The B.

I don’t watch that much TV as it is, so, when one of my shows is cancelled, my little world becomes a little darker… and a little less tits and ass-y…

What will I do with no more Dreama Walker as June?

… Or no more Krysten Ritter as the dirty little whore, Chloe?

… Or no more James van der Beek as James van der Beek?

…. Shit… I’m getting sad just writing this post. ABC has 8 episodes left that they won’t air now. Why? Just air them already; I don’t care what time,my DVR will pick ‘em up!

Now I’m forced to look for new talent who may end up on ABC’s next sitcom. I may have discovered her, too! Her name is Emily Ratajkowski and you need to check her out!

I don’t care what the show might be about, either.

And here is today’s submission for the ladies… the return of Sexy Sellers!

Stay tuned for more Shane…

Enjoy the rest of the weekend folks!

Sexy Saturday ~ I TOLD YA SO!

Back in November, Danica Patrick posted this on Facebook:

I am sad to inform my fans that after 7 years, Paul and I have decided to amicably end our marriage. This isn’t easy for either of us, but mutually it has come to this. He has been an important person and friend in my life and that’s how we will remain moving forward.

It only took a few minutes for me to figure out the real reason for the split, and I predicted it HERE. Yes, Slick Ricky Stenhouse Jr. has been parking his car in her garage!

I don’t think he’s attracted to her because of her ability to drive a race car…

… but rather her dexterity with his “stick shift!”

Anyway, let’s take a trip down Danica Lane, shall we? As always, click to embiggen!

And for the ladies and men who like men, here’s Danica’s new boyfriend, Ricky!

Ya cant say “new” boyfriend, because they’ve been doin’ it seeing each other for months now! And she’s still married… Dirty whore! I’m happy for them!

Enjoy the rest of your weekend, folks!

Sexy Saturday! Oh No! They’ve All Got GUNS!

I offered my opinions regarding gun control last month and I stick by those opinions.

I believe even more, over the last few weeks, that this is really a people issue. A crazy people issue.

I see silly comments like, “Less guns = less gun violence,” or “Less guns = less bullets fired…”

Neither of those statements address the real issue: the person pulling the trigger because, as I hope you’re aware, guns don’t pull their own triggers! I KNOW, that all changes when Skynet becomes self aware…

Cameron… The sexy Terminator

…but we’re not at that point… yet!

Let me compare the above silly comment to a recent ban that was enacted in New York.

New York seems to think, “Less soda = less fat people.” Oh, I’m not makin’ that up, read the article HERE! The government can’t trust the people with their sodas, so they take ‘em away!

By the way, anyone reading this thinking that I’ve crossed over to the dark side by writing “SODA” instead of “POP”; I haven’t! I was concerned that the liberals reading this might read “POP” and misinterpret it as gunfire, thus hiding under their MacBook Air or dropping their iPads, iPods or iPhones!

Silly libs… POP!

One last thing before I get into some sexy people wielding weapons. I know several legal, responsible gun owners; one of which has an arsenal that John Rambo would jerk off to! Everything I’ve read that the President is proposing to control guns will affect those people.

Nothing he is proposing will stop the crazy mass murderers from getting their crazy on, and killing innocent people.

Okay… let’s go! (Click to embiggen!)

And here are some for the ladies and men who like men…

Speaking of John Rambo, here’s one of the best clips form First Blood Part 2:

AAAHHHHH that scene gets me so FIRED UP! …. and for most of it, Rambo doesn’t even have a gun, but loogit all the violence!

I can’t put up that clip without this next one:

“Mission…. ACCOMPLISHED…!”

Enjoy the rest of your weekend, folks!

Sexy Saturday ~ NFL Divisional Playoffs Edition!

Before I get started I have a VERY IMPORTANT MESSAGE for all of you. Well, actually it’s for those of you in the local area from Cleveland to Pittsburgh… I’ve discovered the ultimate bacon at Giant Eagle! Among the many varieties they offer, one is their own brand. It’s a thick sliced peppered bacon! While some brands have shrunk their packages to as little as 12 ozs, Giant Eagles comes as a 24 oz. package. That’s a POUND AND A HALF for you democrats! 17 thick slices!

Also, I no longer fry bacon; I bake it! Try this: Line a cookie sheet (that has sides, dems!) with aluminum foil. Lay the bacon on the sheet (you may have to overlap it a bit to fit it all, but that’s okay). Put it in the oven AND THEN turn the oven up to 400 degrees (you don’t preheat when baking bacon). Depending on the thickness of the bacon it’ll take anywhere from 20-30 minutes to cook. This thick sliced Giant Eagle bacon takes thirty minutes. At the 15 minute mark I remove the pan, un-overlap the bacon, and put it in for another 15 minutes. Simply. Delightful!!!

It takes some adjusting to get it perfect, depending on your oven and, like I said, the thickness of the bacon, but once you get it down, you’ll never wanna fry bacon again!

Now that I’ve made you hungry, guess I’ll make ya horny too!

Here are today’s NFL Divisional matchups!

Representing the AFC we have the Baltimore Ravens…

…at the Denver Broncos…

I’m going with Denver on this one. Look at the position, and the boots, the Broncos cheerleaders are utilizing. I mean… WOW!

Also, Peyton Manning and the rest of the Broncos offense are nearly unstoppable. They go into that no huddle, hurry up shotgun offense and opposing defenses just can’t keep up!

Even that tough Ravens D will get shredded today. All the emotion from Ray Lewis retiring won’t be enough to slow down Manning. Today will be Ray Ray’s last game.

And Joe Flacco can’t hide his douchebaggery two weeks in a row. Anquan Boldin saved his ass last week. Denver’s D won’t allow that to happen.

I say: Denver 34 ~ Baltimore 17

Tonight’s NFC matchup is the Green Bay Packers….

… at the San Francisco 49ers…

I see Green Bay winning this one. HA! You thought I was only gonna base my picks on the teams’ cheerleaders, didn’t you? Well Green Bay doesn’t even have cheerleaders, so I had to picture QB Aaron Rodgers frolicking with his girlfriend, Destiny (There’s a stripper name!) Newton.

A quick thought on cheerleaders in the NFL. 26 of the 32 teams have cheerleaders; that’s 81%. Is it any wonder that 87% of the teams still alive in the playoffs have cheerleaders? NO! Cheerleaders are absolutely necessary for a team to be successful. Am I contradicting myself by saying that Green Bay will be successful without cheerleaders? ABSOLUTELY. I’m hoping my Browns finally get some cheerleaders! The new owner keeps talking about putting a good product on the field for the fans to watch. I can’t imagine they’re talking about the team!

I believe this might be the best game of the weekend. Gonna be pretty close in my opinion. The difference in this game will be the Packers defense. If they can shut down Frank Gore, like they did Adrian Peterson last week, and force Colin Kaepernick to throw the ball…. game over.

Green Bay also has so many damn ways to move the ball, I see them wearing down San Fran’s D.

I say: Green Bay 37 ~ San Francisco 34

Tomorrow’s early game, the NFC matchup, features the Seattle Seahawks…

… at the Atlanta Falcons…

Seahawks all the way! Loogit them cheerleaders!

The tandem of Seattle QB Russell Wilson and RB Marshawn Lynch will make the difference in this game. The read-option shit is awesome and will give the weak Falcon’s D fits.

If Seattle’s D can rattle Matt Ryan a bit, he’ll choke again. The dual threat of Roddy White and Julio Jones will mean nothing. Falcon’s RB Michael Turner is a fat tub of goo and will be a non factor.

I say: Seattle 24 ~ Atlanta 14

The AFC matchup tomorrow is the Houston Texans…

… at the New England Patriots…

GOD I despise tom Brady. He’s the whiniest QB in the history of the league. Even if a defender merely brushes up against him, he cries for a flag.

It’s no wonder that his horse faced “supermodel” wife looks more manly than he does.

That was rude of me to say… Only her horse face is more manly, because Gisele Bundchen has other ASSets…

Oops! I almost forgot I was talking about football games here…

As much as I hate to do it, I gotta go with New England winning this one…

Like the Packers, New England has too many ways to move the ball for Houston to hang in there. Ridley runs pretty well, then they use that little douche Danny Woodhead pretty effectively. As for throwing, Brady is the master! He throws to so many targets; Welker, Lloyd, the TEs Gronkowski & Hernandez (if Hernandez is limited, look for a big game by TE Michael Hoomanawanui), and that little douche Woodhead!

For Houston, Matt Shaub really only has one clear target; WR Andre Johnson. If the Pats can shut him down, I don’t see the Texans having much of a chance.

I expect Texans RB Arian Foster to have a good game, both running and receiving. Did you guys know Foster is a vegan? That means he’s definitely taking HGH! Nobody maintains that much muscle mass by eating dandelions…

I say: Patriots 41 ~ Texans 17

This is the only of my picks in which I’ll be rooting against the eventual winner. I do not want the Pats to win and will be rooting for the Texans. I’m just being realistic with my pick.

Alright… this IS Sexy Saturday, so here are my inclusions for the ladies and men who like men…

49ers QB Colin Kaepernick…

Patriots TE Rob Gronkowski…

 

And a Tom Brady slideshow!

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Enjoy the rest of your weekend, folks! Go Broncos! Go Packers! Go Seahawks! Go Texans!

For Anyone Else Wondering who that Hot Girl is in the DirecTV Commercials…

The latest DirecTV commercial features their new “Genie” technology where apparently one can record 5 shows at once. Well, to be honest, while watching this Bengals/Texans game I didn’t really pay attention to the technology in the commercial as much as I did the girl who is the “Genie.”

She’s stunning! So I looked her up and found out she’s a 22 year old IMG model named Hannah Davis…

And then I saw a story that said she’s rumored to be dating Yankees’ 38 year old shortstop Derek Jeter…

SERIOUSLY??? Can’t this dude stay off the hot girls and let ‘em make their way out of New York and maybe into my area for once?

Dammit, Jeter, GO AWAY!

UPDATE! Featuring ASS…