An Interesting End to National Cleavage Day… and KISSing

Hoo boy last night was too fun funny!

Realizing that we’re not gonna meet anyone while hanging out at each others’ houses, my buddies and I have been venturing out to the local bars to see what’s up. Not much, to be honest… At least not here in tropical Brunswick.

My friend Frank, however, has recently been to bars outside the confines of Brunswick. Based on his research he assured me there is a dating scene out there.

Last night we figured we’d hit a few joints in Strongsville. First stop… Molly McGhee’s; a pretty nice, very Irish “Sports Pub.” Another guy we work with, Joe, was there with his family, so we joined them. I don’t see Joe at work very often as his office is in another building. Joe and I immediately started talking about work. It didn’t take long before we were reprimanded for talking about work; so we changed the subject.

About an hour later, my boss shows up… and the work talk commences once again. It really doesn’t matter at this point as I had surveyed the patrons around the bar and determined it was a pretty old crowd. Hell, it wouldn’t have surprised me if they all started playing Bingo. Molly McGhee’s was a bust.

So we head over to Slim & Chubby’s… right up the street. As soon as we get out of the van (yeah, Frank has a mini van. 2 dudes + mini van = SEXY), we notice these two blondes in a Jeep. There was no way not to notice them… because they had the interior lights on, music crankin’ and were totally seat dancing. That Jeep was a rockin’!

I was happy to see a much younger crowd… but it was much louder due to the live band. Joe, and more of his family, was there too. We grabbed a couple beers and were introduced to the rest of Joe’s family. Frank and I grab seats at the bar and…. here come the dancing blondes. They were pretty attractive, but clearly drunk. Suzi sits next to me; we started chatting. It was difficult not to notice her boobs, because they were huge and hanging out. I commended her for her celebration of National Cleavage Day. She let me know they were fake, but I’d pretty much figured that out already.

The conversation was all over the place because, well, she was pretty messed up, though she denied it.

Then it got weird…. after maybe a half hour of talking, she kept proposing that I should kiss her, to which I politely refused. Then she requested that I go outside so she could show me her boobs. She wanted me to try to find the scars from her augmentation surgery, which she claimed was impossible. I passed on that too, and excused myself so I could go smoke. She followed me outside, bringing one of her other friends with her. She asked her friend if she approved of me… her friend only gave me a dirty look and said she didn’t know me. I agreed with that assessment, and went back inside to find Frank.

Suzi didn’t return for maybe 10 minutes, so I went to see what was going on. The “dirty look” friend confronted me and told me not to hurt her… I’m just like, “What? I have no intentions here. I was checking to see if she’s alright.” Well… I walk around the corner and there she is; she’s got some guy pushed up against the wall, making out with him. WHOA!!

I did a quick 180 and headed back into the bar. I stopped at dirty look’s table and let her know that Suzi IS gonna get hurt. I don’t even know if she intervened. I did, however, see Suzi leaving with that guy a few minutes later. Poor girl, I feel sorry for her.

ANYWAY what did I miss last night? KISS had a concert in New Orleans that was streamed live on their website. I’ve since found the entire show on YouTube, so I’ll check it out at some point. It always amazes me that Gene Simmons (62), Paul Stanley (60), Eric Singer (53), and Tommy Thayer (51) sound so freakin’ good live! Here’s “Black Diamond” from the show last night:

VIA KISSonline

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