I am So Sick of all the Same Sex Marriage Talk… Here are Ten Reasons Why it Should be Banned…

1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn’t changed at all like many of the principles on which this great country was founded; women are still property, blacks still can’t marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of marriages like Britney Spears’ 55 hour marriage to Jason Alexander and Kim Kardashian’s 72 day marriage to Kris Humphries would be destroyed.

Waaaaay too much ass there Kim!

6) The only valid marriages are those which produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn’t be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren’t full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That’s why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without both a male and a female role model at home. That’s why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven’t adapted to cars, the service-sector economy or longer life spans.

2 responses to “I am So Sick of all the Same Sex Marriage Talk… Here are Ten Reasons Why it Should be Banned…

  1. Nice try, but I can tell you obviously one of those freakshows who support the psuedo-marriage, just by judging your satire.

    Comparing homosexuality to eyeglasses, polyester,air conditioning, being tall, cars, & the service-sector economy. Calling women “property” Yup, only a queer can make up stuff this stupid.

    The REAL reasons why the majority of us (by ‘us’ I mean us God-fearing NORMAL folks) are sick of this “same sex marriage” BS is because (1) it is NOT a real marriage, (2) it’s a perverted, & (3) it opens the door for incestous, bestality, & other illicit unions be called as “marriage”. In other words, its a slippery slope. Marriage is defined between a man & a woman. Anything else is a joke & not real marriage.

    It is my honest opinion that you queers ……. morons. Homosexuality is abhorrent behavior. Comparing sexual behavior to stuff that aren’t sexual is idiotic & shows stupidity in your part. Comparing being tall, being black, being a woman to men who pack the fudge is disgusting, vile, sexist, & racist, and that you should please go sodomize yourself with retractable batons & jump off a bridge

    Go fuck yourself. Faggot.

    • Your low level of intelligence is clear based on your lack of proper grammar and spelling. I do appreciate your input, however! God created us in his image, but none of us perfect. You are merely one of his bottom tier examples.

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