Monday Moanin’ ~ Week One ~ Eagles @ Browns

Philly eeked out a 17-16 win against the Brownies… I believe it was a battle of two pretty good defenses! BUT….

Bench Weeden and put in the backup QB… Fire coach Shurmer… Fire Mike Holmgren… It’s because of the replacement referees… Trent Richardson blows… The O line blows… Our wide receivers are shit… Our defense is terrible…

That’s just a sampling of comments I heard from Browns fans during yesterday’s game against the Philadelphia Eagles.

As much as I love going to games at Cleveland Browns Stadium, I also loathe going to games at Cleveland Browns Stadium.


Because 99.7% of Browns fans are incredibly unintelligent people who couldn’t successfully play flag football with a bunch of six year old boys; let alone coach those boys, yet they claim to know how to run an NFL franchise.

On to yesterday’s action… Like I said, I was there! Here I’ll address all the comments I mentioned above.

Bench Weeden and put in the backup QB ~

They started rolling out that huge flag and Cleveland’s QB1, Brandon Weeden,  got caught under it so the national media has been picking on the Browns, and Weeden ever since. Hell, the flag footage made “C’mon Man” tonight on ESPN.

Yes, B-Weed had a historically terrible game yesterday. He faced 2011’s 8th ranked Eagles defense and they kicked his ass! He looked lost! His timing and his throws were off target. Let’s see how all five of this years’ rookie QBs stacked up against the opposing defenses, shall we? No stats…. just Win/Loss.

  • Andrew Luck ~ Lost against Chicago’s 17th ranked D… L 21-41
  • Bob Griffin III ~ Destroyed the Saints’ 24th ranked D… W 40-32
  • Ryan Tannehill ~ Struggled with Texan’s 2nd ranked D… L 10-30
  • Brandon Weeden ~ Shit because of Philly’s 8th ranked D… L 16-17

These dudes were all first round picks… the final starting rookie, picked in the third round was…

  • Russell Wilson ~ Lost to Arizona’s 18th ranked D… L 16-20

Make of that what you will, but I ain’t throwing the towel in on Weeden. Why? Rookies struggle…

But put in QB2? ~

Cleveland’s backup quarterback is the backup because he’s not the starter! When he was the starter he went 6-15. You think if you put him in he’s gonna light shit up? He’s never done that before but yet you think he will now? Against Philly?

Fire coach Shurmer ~

I will say that some of the play calling was questionable, especially at the end of the first half. But is that on offensive coordinator Brad Childress or coach Shurmer? I don’t know… I do know that Shurmer was stuck with our now backup QB for all of last year and that dude was just putrid.

Fire Mike Holmgren ~

Oh yeah…. like he has anything to do with the play on the field….

It’s because of the replacement referees ~

Ya know, I get really sick of people calling them scabs… The fuckin’ union referees won’t work until they get their pay/benefits raise, so these refs get belittled? The ones who just want a job? And the regular refs never make mistakes? Ha ha, right! The union refs are just as mistake prone as as the refs who want to work.

Trent Richardson blows ~

Yeah… the drunk dude two seats to my right kept saying how horrid T-Rich is. This was Trent’s first game. Period. He had no preseason contact to maybe get used to the speed of the NFL game. Give him time, douchebag, he’s gonna be a stud!

Also, Trent did this to Philly’s LB Kurt Coleman!

The O line blows ~

Philly’s D line is tough! And they have depth! I expected trouble there. Give ’em some time folks!

Our wide receivers are shit ~

I sort of agree with this one… Lots of drops. Greg Little seems to be an issue, here.

Our defense is terrible ~

This statement is just stupid…. Philly’s offense was the 4th ranked last year! Our D absolutely annihilated them, hitting or pressuring Michael Vick 19 times! A record for Vick and the most in the league the last two years… We kicked Vick’s ass!

Our defense is the backbone of our team, you drunk douche!

If anything, yesterday’s game was a defensive battle… one that the national media won’t recognize or talk about!

We both sucked today, coach!

Oh well… now we’re 0-1 and may never win a game again, if you listen to the national media! I guess we’ll see! I’m actually more confident about our game against Cincinnati next Sunday…


Hug your children and love them every day

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