Week 29 NASCAR Update ~ Danica Patrick Now Responsible for Unemployment…

This past weekend’s racing took place at Chicagoland Speedway. Chicagoland is a 1.5 mile tri-oval located in Joliet, IL. This joint!

I’m pretty much live blogging the Nationwide Series race, since I’ve got nothing else to do! Ugh… you really can’t live blog a race without losing readers, so I’ll summarize!

Austin rolled off 2nd, and Danica 12th. Austin battled with the leaders, though Joey Logano kicked ass early leading 51 of the first 52 laps. With 42/200 laps remaining, Austin is second… a couple seconds behind Kyle Busch.

By the first caution Danica had lost a couple spots, dropping to 14th. She gained back those two spots in the pits and has been running between 12th and 15th all afternoon. Chicago is a good track for her. The cars get spread out so she doesn’t really have to race anybody. This is exactly why she hasn’t crashed yet. Yet… there are still 29 laps to go and all the cars just got bunched up again because of a caution. Will she make it the final 43.5 miles with clean fenders?

Let’s watch!

20 to go… and Ricky Stenhouse Jr., in his very fast Mustang, just blew by Kyle Busch for the lead! Austin’s in 3rd and Danica 12th.

10 to go… Stenhouse running away from 2nd place Kyle Busch. Austin still in 3rd and Danica remains 12th. SEE WHAT I MEAN! Live blogging NASCAR is stupid! Don’t leave me now!

Quick! Here’s a video I took with Jessica Biel…

CHECKERED FLAG!!!

Danica finished 12th, Austin 3rd and Ricky Stenhouse Jr., in a Ford Mustang with a school bus paint job, won that shit (and took over the points lead for the championship)!

Note the school bus paint job!

HOLY SHIT! This just in: Long story short. Dale Earnhardt Jr. owns Danica’s car. Last week, Jr. fired his Uncle, Tony Eury Sr. (JR Motorsports competition director) because the team sucks. Today, Jr. fired his cousin, Tony Eury Jr. (Danica’s crew chief), again, because the team sucks. The Eurys and Earnhardts are family and have been working together forever in racing…. and now Earnhardt Jr. has cut ties with the Eury family, his family, because he’s got a shitty driver in the car.

I know this comes from the sponsors… I had a conversation with my buddy, Jim, yesterday in which I said Danica’s sponsors (specifically GoDaddy.com) will continue to pump money into that team, and Danica, as long as they get a return on their investment. Sponsors sometimes ask for changes on teams. Unfortunately, I believe the folks at GoDaddy.com feel that changing the competition director and crew chief will fix the problems on the track. They won’t. The driver is the problem with the #7 car.. not the competition director or the crew chief.  And Dale Jr. is an asshole for bending over for GoDaddy.com

For Sunday’s Sprint Cup Series race, Dale Jr. fuckface qualified fourth. THEN, after his qualifying run, he missed a shift and over revved the engine. This may or may not have damaged the engine, but these teams won’t risk it with that kind of stuff, so they changed the engine. NASCAR rules say if you change an engine, you go all the way to the rear; Jr. jerkoff will start dead last.

I did not watch yesterday’s race, as I was wayyy to busy watching football, eating and drinking.

Dale Jr. asshole somehow finished 8th. How he did it I don’t care right now; sometimes shit comes up and I don’t care to write or do research anymore. But I’ll finish this post before I bow out….

Brad Keselowski won yesterday…

Honestly? Keselowski is a good driver, but he aggravates the shit out of me, prolly because of this:

BUT… that stuff happens in NASCAR… and Keselowski will be driving a Miller Lite FORD next year, so I’m happy about that!

As for Dale Earnhardt Jr., you’re dead to me. Fuck you with a connecting rod!

Numbers after week 28:

Austin:

Starts Wins Top 5 Top 10 Avg. Start Avg. Finish
26 1 13 20 8.5 7.6

Dale…

Starts Wins Top 5 Top 10 Avg. Start Avg. Finish
27 1 10 17 15.0 9.9

Danica…

Starts Wins Top 5 Top 10 Avg. Start Avg. Finish
26 0 0 2 15.3 20.5

Hug your children and love them every day

Related Posts:

Week twenty eight
Week twenty seven
Week twenty six
Week twenty four/twenty five combo
Week twenty three
Week twenty two
Week twenty one
Week twenty
Week nineteen
Week eighteen
Week seventeen
Week sixteen
Week fifteen
Week fourteen
Week thirteen
Week twelve
Week eleven
Week ten 

One response to “Week 29 NASCAR Update ~ Danica Patrick Now Responsible for Unemployment…

  1. Reblogged this on Miles Armstrong and commented:
    This is the type of wreck NASCAR fans wait lap by lap to see live at a race!

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