Already Freakin’ Out about Today ~ Week Five ~ Browns @ Giants

 

My pregame thoughts:

Dammit! We didn’t have any wide receivers before, and now we have even less? How is that possible?

OHHH! It’s because it’s the freakin’ Browns! Two starting WRs that would be way down the depth chart on any good NFL team, Mohamed Massaquoi and Travis Benjamin, have been declared out for tomorrow’s game. Massaquoi doesn’t surprise me, because he’s an injury magnet with all his concussions and weak hamstrings.

I guess Travis Benjamin shouldn’t surprise me either, considering that he’s the size of a toddler. This NFL game is rough on him, so apparently he can only play every other week. My buddy, Frank The Mayor of Funtown calls that wussitis! I believe that’s what it is…

But now the Canton-bound Brandon Weeden has no one to throw to. Yeah, he can throw to Greg Little, but that bumbling idiot can’t catch a cold; and Josh Gordon couldn’t run a correct route if his life depended on it. Josh Cribbs is probably still suffering from concussion symptoms so he won’t be much of a factor.

Here are some interesting Browns facts I stumbled across… on the Giants website:

Cleveland is the NFL’s shortest (average height 6-1.1 inches), lightest (242.6 pounds), youngest (25.5 years) and least-experienced (3.25 years) team.

THAT’S WHY WE’RE 0-4! We’re short, skinny, young and dumb!

This is the last game of Browns shutdown corner Joe Haden’s suspension for rape dog fighting drunk driving smoking weed taking an Adderall pill in the offseason.

Having said that, NY’s Victor Cruze will prolly be doing a lot of this:

And who knows how effective future Hall of Famer RB Trent Richardson will be today. He said this when asked if he thinks he can have a successful running game:

“Oh yeah, if we put a hat on a number, just cover them up, I think we can get yards on ‘em. But at the same time, I know they’re going to throw everything they can at us. I’m pretty sure they’re going to game plan on our running game, and so we’ve got to make sure we open up the passing game so we can get some good runs in.

We’ve got to run some outside zone, and we’ve really got to try cover up No. 90 [Jason Pierre-Paul] as much as you can and big [Justin] Tuck, I think that if we cover the edges and run our hardest – don’t be doing all this juking and stuff like that, one move and go – I think we can have pretty good success in the running game.”

Pretty benign commentary there if ya ask me. Apparently Trent ruffled Giants DE Osi Umenyiora’s panties. Osi had this to say in response:

“If (Trent) looks on tape and he thinks he sees some candy, come try and get it.”

I’m not sure what that means, Osi, but I’m certain Trent doesn’t care. Trent’s a highly motivated young man. Anything you say will just motivate him more. He will produce today.

Speaking of production, or reproduction specifically, Trent’s girlfriend, Sevina Fatu, gave birth to their THIRD child on Friday; a boy, to add to his two daughters. Three kids at age 21. WOW! Dude knows how to pound the hole… So let’s get at it today… on the field, I mean!

Richardson family fact…

Note that Sevina is wearing a NASCAR jacket… That’s odd…

They live in Columbia Station, OH… Where I grew up!

GO BROWNS!

Hug your children and love them every day

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