Already Freakin’ Out about Today ~ Week Seven ~ Browns @ Colts

Holy shit… we’re playing the powerhouse Indianapolis Colts. Their QB, Andrew Luck, was picked #1 by Indy in April. Everyone on ESPN says he’s the next Peyton Manning. We don’t stand a chance!

Wait… the Colts are 2-3? That’s no powerhouse! Yeah, they beat Minnesota and Green Bay… but by an average of 3 points. Their losses, however, average a 15 point deficit!

My our Brownies average 10 points in their wins! Our losses average a 7.8 point deficit!

Know what that means? We lose about half as bad as Indy does! Seriously, to me, it means we have a better defense!

Forget about all those numbers… What’s up with this Andrew Luck doofus? Is he Peyton Manning?

Nope. Not yet at least! Let’s compare Luck’s numbers to Brandon Weeden’s thus far…

QB COMP ATT PCT YDS YDS/ATT LONG TD INT RATE
Luck 118 221 53.4 1488 6.73 41 7 7 72
BW3 129 231 55.8 1519 6.58 71 7 10 68.1

They’re very similar QB’s, actually. As far as league rankings go, Luck is 30th and Weeden’s dead last based on QB rating. Technically, they BOTH suck! Yet ESPN talks like Luck is the second coming of Peyton Manning and Weeden is a bust…

Weeden doesn’t suck though. He’s the best QB we’ve had since the Browns came back in ’99! If you take out his historically bad performance against Philly in week one, I think he goes from dead last to mid pack.

I really have no concerns today.

Ok… I’m a bit upset that Browns RB Trent Richardson has bruised ribs and could potentially be limited against one of the worst run defenses in the league. Check it out… he’ll be wearing a flak jacket today so should be safe if anyone tries to shoot him!

If Trent gets gunned down, RB Montario Hardesty was pretty good last week and he could be tough today. OKAY! There’s a concern… Hardesty fumbles… Ugh! Don’t do it today, buddy!

I’ve got way more faith in our WRs than I had early in the season. Josh Gordon is lookin’ like he might be the real deal… Josh Cooper has sure hands and should be playing today. YAY for white WRs!

I’m so confident I’m calling this one! Cleveland 34 ~ Indy 13.

GO BROWNS! Let’s continue the road to the playoffs today!

Hug your children and love them every day

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