Monday… er… Wednesday Moanin’ ~ Ravens 14, Browns 6.

Weeden Ravens

I forgot last year I wrote posts to relive the horror of the previous day’s Browns game (actually 5 times I got to write about wins!) so I guess I better get into it again. Cleveland stumbled into Baltimore Sunday only to suffer a painful, boring loss…

This past Sunday’s football activities were hosted by my buddy, Chad, from work. He had a Week 2 party, so we had the Bills game (Chad and a few of our friends are Buffalo fans) and Browns game on TVs that I installed in Chad’s recreation room! There was lots of food… and beer! Okay…. on to the football!

 

Let me start with the positives. Defense and special teams looked alright, but that’s about it. What a horrible game to watch. Here’s how the first half went:

Baltimore went 12 plays on their first drive, 51 yards only to miss a 50 yard field goal..

Cleveland has a nice pass play on their first from scrimmage, 53 yards from Weeden to TE Cameron to Baltimore’s 7. Then they try to jam Trent Richardson over right guard for 3 yards, then left guard for 1 more. Call a timeout, then whiff on a pass from Weeden to Bess from the 3 yardline.

Y’all ever hear of a play action pass???

Anyway, Billy Cundiff kicked a field goal to put us up 3-0. Here’s where the defensive battle kicked in…

Baltimore goes 5 plays and punts…

Cleveland goes 6 plays and punts…

I’ve had a few people recommend that I try iced coffee… Seems like a weird concept, but I’m up for just about anything, lately, so I attempted to make my own this morning. HUGE FAIL! I brewed my usual recipe, filled my big Browns cup with ice and dispensed my coffee into it. I immediately strained the coffee into my travel mug, which contained half a dozen more ice cubes. The result? Ice cold coffee flavored water! It was putrid! But I don’t give up that easy. I just brewed a pot and filled an ice cube tray with that, so all the cubes used for the cooling agent will be ice coffee cubes. I’m brilliant! NEXT UP? Hot beer!

Baltimore goes 4 plays and punts…

Cleveland goes 6 plays and punts…

Baltimore goes 3 and out… punts…

Cleveland goes on a nice 10 play drive, then punts…

Baltimore goes 3 and out… punts…

Thank God Chad’s dip was so awesome… and the pizza… and the shrimp cocktail! And the beer! At least I was eating & drinking well! Otherwise I woulda called it a day!

Cleveland goes 3 and out… punts…

Baltimore goes on a 5 play drive only so their kicker can miss another field goal, this time from 44 yards…

Baltimore’s kicker is the one who replaced Cleveland’s current kicker, Billy Cundiff on the Raven’s roster.

Well, after that 2nd missed field goal, the Browns marched down the field so Cundiff could kick a 51 yard field goal to put us up 6-0.

That concluded the first half.

Horrible, horrible football. At this point, however, our defense has done their job.

If only we had a fuckin’ offense to put some points on the board!

Trent Richardson’s production was mediocre at best, though they ran him between the tackles a lot. Dude’s more effective on the outside, or in passing situations, but who’s gonna listen to me?

Weeden didn’t look too bad… he does look lost at times, definitely not confident, and looks clumsy when he “scrambles”… but ya can’t blame the guy for more dropped balls by the WRs…

greglittle

…. Yeah, that’s Greg Fucking Little, letting another one get away. AND the dude doesn’t understand motor vehicle laws and keeps getting pulled over… I say cut his sorry ass…

Anyway… that douchebag, Joe Flacco, found the endzone a couple times in the second half for Baltimore and that’s all she wrote!

Well, this week the Browns went to their THIRD QB, Brian Hoyer, after Brandon Weeden developed wussitis in his right thumb late in Sunday’s game. Hoyer is prolly better than me, so that’s a plus! I guess a lot of fans are excited because he’s a local kid; went to St. Ignatius in Cleveland, an all boys school. That previous sentence doesn’t imply that there’s anything gay about all boy schools, because dudes from Ignatius regularly bang girls from St. Joseph Academy up the street… so I’ve heard!

I’ve got no idea what to expect from Hoyer this Sunday when the Browns travel to Minnesota to play the Vikings. What really sucks is that I’ve got Minnesota’s RB Adrian Peterson on one of my fantasy teams so I need him to kick ass… against the Browns!

UGH! Football is stressful!

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