What to Watch Today instead of NASCAR’s Finale!

Browns Bengals

That’s right. Thankfully, today is the final race of the 2013 NASCAR season. I haven’t watched a single lap of “racing” since the September Debacle at Richmond, after which Jeff Gordon was added to the Chase by NASCAR’s CEO, Brian France.

I just got sidetracked while surfing the interwebs and checked out Brian France’s net worth at www.celebritynetworth.com… HOLY SHIT! That dudes worth $1 BILLION!! That’s insane!

Anyway, today’s race is 3:00ish from Homestead-Miami Speedway. Three drivers have a shot to win the championship: Kevin Harvick (34 points out), Toyota traitor Matt Kenseth (28 points out) and Jimmie Jackass Johnson (current leader). I’d like to see a scenario, early on, in which Kenseth and Johnson are involved in the same wreck and then Harvick goes on to win the championship. Why? Because Kenseth is a dork and Johnson is a stiff. Nobody wants a boring champion.

Last year, Brad Keselowski’s championship win was a breath of fresh air… check out his drunken post race interview:

… of course that was deemed as not politically correct because of beer, but fuck that! Brad’s a dude with a personality! He’ll wreck ya to win a race, like in the old days of NASCAR!

Chances are, barring the crash scenario I envisioned above, Jimmie Johnson will win the championship today and that’s gonna suck because it will be his 6th cup in 8 years. And he’s a cheater! I read a story on ESPN the other day in which Richard Petty, NASCAR’s winningest cheatingest driver got behind Johnson and said he’d win the championship today and prolly 2 to 4 more before his career is over.

Reader Jeff asked me, via Facebook, how one cheats in NASCAR… Well HERE are some examples, Jeff! Enjoy!

So, instead of watching that crap around 3:00 y’all should check out some NFL football! If you’re in the Ohio, West Virginia or Eastern Kentucky area you’ll have access to the tail end of the Browns/Bengals game from Cincinnati! Looks like the weather is gonna be horrible there; rainy and windy, which blows because the Browns don’t have a running game that’s important in shitty weather.

At the same time is the Lions at Steelers game! Gosh I hope Detroit kicks Pittsburgh’s ass! I enjoy it when Pittsburgh blows! I may be switching back and forth between this game and the Browns game!

A good portion of the country will have the Ravens at Bears game… Go Bears! Us Browns fans need Baltimore to lose!

Outside of football, there is also go kart Formula One racing from Austin, TX and yet more ice skating, this time from Paris!

I’m pretty sure there are also a handful of zombie shows on too!

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