The other day, I was struggling to come up with an idea for today’s post so I asked my daughters for some help. Here’s the quick conversation:
ME: Hey girls, what should I write Sexy Saturday about?
DELANA (my 6 year old): You!
That cracked us all up!
I mean, I could do a Sexy Saturday about me, but I kinda like the fact that this site sorta flies under the radar. If I were to put up a bunch of sexy pictures of me on here, or videos of me twerking at the club, For Shiggles might blow up and I’m not quite ready for all that attention.
Anyway, I posted that commentary between Delana and I on Facebook and received an odd request from a
very good friend of mine young woman whom I think of as one of my own children; reader Elaine’s eldest daughter. She said:
You should find pretty pregnant ladies so I don’t feel like a beluga whale.
Understand one thing, folks… Elaine’s eldest daughter is, I believe, 33 weeks pregnant, but she certainly shouldn’t feel like a beluga whale…
… though I have seen her pissed off and sorta look like that!
Anyway I decided to go with her recommendation and feature some hot women here who became impregnated at some point.
I was sorta skeptical of Googling “Sexy Pregnant Women” for fear of ending up on so weird fetish sites, so I just went with some celebrities who I remember getting knocked up…
You may remember Demi Moore. She was pretty hot years ago, but I think she’s like 107 years old now… she was in this awesome movie called Striptease back in 1996…
… Five years prior to that movie, Demi was on the cover of Vanity Fair magazine at seven months pregnant…
… Bruce Willis was responsible for that!
Or how about the artist formerly known as Britney Spears?
… 10 years ago she married
Kevin Federline some douche who got to have sex with “Hot Britney” not too long before she became “Crazy Britney.” She did a photo shoot with Harper’s Bazaar magazine while pregnant with their second son…
… I don’t believe she ever lost that baby weight.
Speaking of baby weight, the average human baby weighs right around 7 1/2 pounds at full term. My ex wife damn near doubled her weight when she was pregnant with our first child. She ballooned to 170 pounds from her normal 100 pounds! Now if babies weighed 50 pounds I’d have understood the gain, but Alexis weighed in at 7 lbs. 9 1/2 oz.
I remember attempting to have a conversation with her midway through the pregnancy about healthy eating…
ME: You prolly shouldn’t eat that whole bag of chips.
HER: Aren’t you going grocery shopping today?
HER: I made a list. You might want to take the truck when you go.
Actually, that conversation never happened. She got pissed at me for mentioning healthy eating and started yelling at me. Couldn’t understand her because of the donut in her mouth.
Anyway, here’s another one…
… Hoo boy did I like Christina Aguilera and that’s my all time favorite video of hers. With all the grinding there, I’m pretty sure she got pregnant while filming it!
This one pisses me off… Megan Fox!
…Not only did she marry
Brian Austin Green that dork from 90210, she let him do stuff to her which resulted in her becoming pregnant…
Awwwww… how cute!
Here’s another case of a dork snagging a hot girl who’s way out of his league. New England Patriots quarterback, Tom Brady…
… and his wife Gisele Bündchen.
Brady has scored 373 times on the field during his twelve seasons with the Patriots. His best score thus far, however, was Gisele…
Last but not least, we have Jessica Simpson!
I believe Jessica used the same “nutrition plan” as my ex wife ’cause she blew up!
So to Elaine’s eldest daughter: You are beautiful…
… Your husband is a great dude…
… and I can’t wait to meet the little one!
Sorry, I don’t have a submission this week for the ladies and men who like men. Go ahead, Google “pregnant man.” EWW!
I did, however, stumble across this pretty cool picture.
Enjoy the rest of your weekend, folks!