Tag Archives: Barack Obama

Kelly Clarkson vs. Beyonce Knowles ~ WHO YA GOT!

Milli Vanilli

I must preface this post by stating that Beyonce has a phat ass fantastic voice! I’m not questioning her talent at all.

Problem is, she recorded a beautiful rendition of the National Anthem on Sunday and then Obama played it on a big boom box yesterday during his inauguration ceremony, while she lip synced to it! It’s pretty obvious:

Kelly Clarkson also went to work yesterday and performed an awesome ‘My Country, ‘Tis of Thee’. Check THIS out:

Anybody else get aggravated by that smug look on the president’s face? Damn, dude, you’re one of us…!

Wouldn’t it be cool if the NFL yanked Beyonce from the Super Bowl halftime show and let Kelly Clarkson do it, since she’s obviously a better, more confident live performer?

I have already predicted that, after yesterday’s performance, Beyonce will receive a shower of “Booos” when she takes the stage in New Orleans. That’s just gonna piss off P Diddy Jay Z and who knows what’ll happen then!

Sexy Saturday! Oh No! They’ve All Got GUNS!

I offered my opinions regarding gun control last month and I stick by those opinions.

I believe even more, over the last few weeks, that this is really a people issue. A crazy people issue.

I see silly comments like, “Less guns = less gun violence,” or “Less guns = less bullets fired…”

Neither of those statements address the real issue: the person pulling the trigger because, as I hope you’re aware, guns don’t pull their own triggers! I KNOW, that all changes when Skynet becomes self aware…

Cameron... The sexy Terminator

Cameron… The sexy Terminator

…but we’re not at that point… yet!

Let me compare the above silly comment to a recent ban that was enacted in New York.

New York seems to think, “Less soda = less fat people.” Oh, I’m not makin’ that up, read the article HERE! The government can’t trust the people with their sodas, so they take ’em away!

By the way, anyone reading this thinking that I’ve crossed over to the dark side by writing “SODA” instead of “POP”; I haven’t! I was concerned that the liberals reading this might read “POP” and misinterpret it as gunfire, thus hiding under their MacBook Air or dropping their iPads, iPods or iPhones!

Silly libs… POP!

One last thing before I get into some sexy people wielding weapons. I know several legal, responsible gun owners; one of which has an arsenal that John Rambo would jerk off to! Everything I’ve read that the President is proposing to control guns will affect those people.

Nothing he is proposing will stop the crazy mass murderers from getting their crazy on, and killing innocent people.

Okay… let’s go! (Click to embiggen!)

And here are some for the ladies and men who like men…

Speaking of John Rambo, here’s one of the best clips form First Blood Part 2:

AAAHHHHH that scene gets me so FIRED UP! …. and for most of it, Rambo doesn’t even have a gun, but loogit all the violence!

I can’t put up that clip without this next one:

“Mission…. ACCOMPLISHED…!”

Enjoy the rest of your weekend, folks!

Election Fun Via Social Networking!

Well there ya have it! President Obama was re-elected! YAY! Now we can look forward to four more years of angry finger pointing, failure to make progress with Congress, increasing unemployment, increasing entitlements, beating up job creators, excessive rounds of golf and bowing down to world leaders. I could go on but I won’t.

Speaking of world leaders, one huge issue that was largely ignored was foreign policy. Watch this trailer for the upcoming ‘Red Dawn’ remake, but substitute Russia and China for the North Koreans:

If our government stays on the same foreign policy path they’ve been on the last four years, ‘Red Dawn’ will happen. I guarantee it…

Anyway, the last couple days I saw some interesting stuff on Facebook and twitter. Okay maybe it wasn’t interesting but, instead, bat shit crazy! Take a lookie!

The same guy who said this:


Also said this [sic erat scriptum, of course]:

i love how ppl say everyone who voted for obama doesnt work…

Actually a lot of Obama supporters enjoy the entitlements. Unemployment and food stamp usage have both increased at terrifying rates since he moved into the White House.

well i bust my ass for a living and romney doesnt support unions.

Did you know that A LOT of people aren’t under the spell of unions? They bust their asses at work too! I’m one of those people! Don’t get me wrong, there are union workers who bust their asses too! Just like you! Romney is a successful businessman. When faced with cutting spending a smart businessman is gonna look at the inflated costs involved with working with union companies! Have no fear… unions aren’t going anywhere.

so before u go sayin we dont work get the facts striaght. there are some that dont work but really who is working out of republicans they hire ppl to do everything.

Republicans hire ppl people to do everything? WHOA! Are you kidding me? You just chastised people for hiring people? That’s job creation! Oh yeah, democrats hire people too!

support the working men and women for a change. half the ppl i kno voted for romney and none of them could even afford what he would do to us.

What the hell was Romney gonna “do to us”? Which commercial or internet meme did you fall for?

Here was another good one:

Offering access to birth control is the best way to reduce abortions!!

??? Oh I’ve got an analogy for you! Offering access to weight loss pills is the best way to reduce liposuction!!! OR… Offering access to cars is the best way to reduce airplane crashes!!! That’s just stupid logic!

WHAT THE FUCK? If ya don’t wanna get pregnant, don’t have sex! If you absolutely have to have sex, go buy some birth control! My tax dollars shouldn’t provide a safety net for you to be irresponsible! I know, the promiscuous ones always say, “It’s cheaper to provide free birth control than to raise a baby in the system.” That is true but, dammit, you made your bed now lay in it! Have the baby and give it up for adoption instead of killing it (or as Planned Parenthood calls it, removing the tissue after fetal demise)! There are a lot of people out there who would love to adopt a child!

There were also smart people on Facebook; my buddy, Tim:

Just a couple thoughts for the newly re-elected…

Dear Mr. President,

First… Congrats, even though I didn’t vote for you.

Second… This economy is sh!t! …fix it! We import more than we export… World economy my a$$!

Bring back manufacturing to this country! \m/

Third… We need jobs here on US soil! Why are we allowing companies to outsource off shore?!?!

This bothers me to no end… And I’ll just use American car manufacturers as one example.They shut down plants HERE and have their stuff assembled in Canada and Mexico. WHY? Because the freakin’ American unions drive up the costs per vehicle. It’s cheaper to outsource it.

Fourth… Secure our borders and quit policing the world.

Yes! Yes! Yes! I’m sorry Israel.. take care of yourself. We gotta quit being the big bullies on the block and take care of our own first! Sorry Saudis! Iraq and Afghanistan: if it takes more than, say, eight weeks for American soldiers to train you as military, you don’t make the cut!

Speaking of our borders, did y’all know a Russian attack sub was on our east coast a couple weeks ago, clearly messing with us? Look it up! (hint: it’s not on CNN, NBC or ABC)

Lastly, but most importantly… Screw the U.N. …the second amendment stays the way it was written.

Yes! The U.N. shouldn’t be dictating anything to us, especially our options for protecting ourselves. I believe we should be out of the U.N. altogether, but that’s just me!

Here’s some Motley Crue jackassery…

Tommy Lee (one of my favorite drummers, by the way):

 Sooooo happy that fucking idiot didn’t win! Looks like I won’t be on the 11pm news tonight! Thank the baby Jesus!

Why ya gotta be like that? I understand you’re crazy and infected with who knows what from Pamela Anderson years ago, but why the name calling?

At least Nikki isn’t a douchebag…

Nikki Sixx:

I don’t care WHO you VOTE for, just fucking do it. The power is in OUR HANDS. 

One last douche before I get outta here!

Beyonce… known mostly for being a great singer and sex symbol…

Her dumb ass tweeted this picture to Mitt Romney supporters when the election was called…

Screw you, Bouncy… I hope you twist your ankle during your Super Bowl performance.
~ G

Sexy Saturday ~ Election Edition ~ Who’s Supporting Who?

Hoo boy! This election season is nearly over! Thank God!

I’ve had it with all the political ads, on both sides. I’m done arguing with clueless people who blindly follow Obama without researching any of his claims, or failures since he came into office, and prior.

I wrote before how all politicians are asses, but what about their supporters? I couldn’t care less if these supporters are asses. My concern is: ARE THEY SEXY?

It’s pretty common knowledge that most celebrities support Obama whoever’s running on the left. I’ve never tried to figure out why that is, but I’m sure it has to do with California… or art… 

So let’s check out the lefties…


Sorry about that one… I think that’s some 17 year old boy… Let’s try again…


There we go! That’s back when she was relevant. Nowadays, she’s an annoying old hag…

Oh… it pains me that this beauty is an Obama supporter…

Olivia Wilde…

I follow Olivia on twitter. I don’t believe she’s ever tweeted anything pro-Obama; she only spews anti-Mitt stuff. 

If she would stay just like that for, say, 7 minutes, I’m certain I could change her vote. Hell, I’ll even “cover” the birth control!

Eva Longoria…

Ok… hold on for this one…

Click to embiggen! Eva’s an annoying twit but, dear God, loogit that ass! 

I could go on forever with the liberals because, like I said, they are the majority in Hollywood…

But there are some smart ones…

Patricia Heaton…

… and her enormous boobs…

… support Mitt!

Julianne Hough…

USA! USA! I understand she was on Dancing With the Stars…

She’s cute!

Jenna Jameson…

THAT was a fun Google search!

Stacey Dash…

USA! USA! As you can see, Stacey isn’t caucasian…

When she endorsed Mitt Romney she caught all kinds of hell from the black community. Death threats on twitter. Unreal…

And of course Mitt has idiots throwing their support at him…

Lindsay Lohan…

Ugh… can you believe she’s 26? She looks terrible… must be from ingesting all that coke and semen… 

Here’s a better one…

This one’s not too bad either… 

Okay… guess I need a couple for the ladies and men who like men…

For you libs, I present Billy Joe Armstrong, that dork from ‘Green Day’.

Billy Joe has the same issues with coke and semen as Lindsay Lohan does!

And for the intelligent ones out there… Kid Rock!

And when I say Kid Rock I mean the original, not the Kenny Chesney wannabe. That dude’s name is Bob Ritchie, and his song ‘Born Free’ is one that Mitt has used throughout his campaign. Mitt should be using this song for his campaign..


I must get going. Now remember people, if you’re gonna vote do your research, educate yourself. Don’t vote based on a commercial you saw on TV. If you’re not gonna educate yourself, do us all a favor and don’t vote.

REMEMBER: Republicans vote on Tuesday, November 6th. Democrats vote on Wednesday!

Enjoy the rest of your weekend, folks! GO BROWNS!

Hug your children and love them every day

100% of Political Polls are Stupid!

Oh HELL yeah! I’m so fired up! I’m gonna drink some beers and watch me some good ole fashioned debatin’ tonight! I can’t wait to see this guy:

Take on this guy:

Unfortunately fortunately, the first guy won’t be able to use his teleprompter. That’s President Obama in case you couldn’t tell! That doofus will manufacture some tasty sound bites sans teleprompter.

Here’s what I expect to hear from The President: “Derp… Uhhh, LOOK! Bush, derp, UH! Dumped tax dollars into revived General Motors Chrysler. Uh, LOOK!”

I’ve got a feeling that Mitt Romney’s gonna mop the floor with The President tonight. Just my gut feeling…

That’s why I have to actually watch the debate… and you should too! There is no relying on the media for accurate reporting any more. Don’t believe me? Check THIS out…

If all you do is check in on NBC/MSN or CNN, all you’re gonna find out tomorrow morning is that Obama CRUSHED Romney; because Romney is shipping 45,000,000 jobs a day overseas via Bain Capital (including your grandma, who is now assembling iPhone 5s in China).

And if you fancy FOX? They’ll be reporting that Obama wants to tax the shit out of the job creators (millionaires), continue to let almost 50% of workers pay little to no taxes, and increase costs of healthcare exponentially. Wait…

You just can’t trust the media, and if you do, without doing your own research, you’ve become a sheep. I recommend you don’t vote.

Ya know what else you can’t trust? Polls. I used to think polls were cool, when I’d just look at the results, and not the research.

This morning I saw a headline: SHOCK POLL… ROMNEY 47% ~ OBAMA 47%

Instead of gettin’ all fired up and saying, “Hoo Boy, we got ourselves a tie,” I looked at the research. They polled 1,005 likely voters. SERIOUSLY?

From what I can tell, there are around 200,000,000 registered “likely voters” in this country. It’s difficult to get an accurate number on that considering the high number of illegal undocumented aliens Obama voters workers and dead people democrats who vote in Florida. TWICE! Ha ha! ZINNGGGGG!

Anyway… some SHOCK POLL gets .0005%, or 1 in 200,000 American voters on the phone and that’s a number we can rely on?

That’s right, man! BULLSHIT!

I did some polling myself at work and home today. Here are MY results:

100% of those polled were unlikely to vote.

  • 25% were women hoping to get married soon.
  • 50% were recently divorced men.
  • 25% were male dogs.

If forced to vote at gunpoint?

  • 100% of women would vote for Roseanne. Wait… What?

Dear GOD… not sure I can ever un-see that! Okay, back to the polling…

  • 50% of men would vote for “I like to party!”
  • 50% of men would vote for Gary Johnson, or Ron Paul if he wasn’t 600 years old, and blacked out by all the liberal media.
  • 100% of male dogs would vote for Obama. Dogs are unusually vocal voters, by the way! They’re real big on the whole free food and free housing thing. All the dogs I talked to enjoy not having to work; and they love the free healthcare. Also, dogs won’t vote for Mitt because of his history of dog transportation.

I tried to poll a female dog and she started screaming at me that, “Republicans need to stay out of my vagina. I want Barack!” Okay then… there ya go Barack! Or maybe let Biden do it!

So there ya go! That’s my SHOCK POLL!

By the way, my polling results were derived from speaking to unlikely voters age 27-37; and 21 in dog years. A total of three unlikely human voters and one unlikely dog voter (Bernie) were polled.

Multiply my results by 200,000,000 likely voters… and Chuck Norris WINS!

Enjoy the debate tonight, folks!

Hug your children and love them every day

I Just Don’t Get It….

Perhaps I could’ve done some research on this subject but I’m uncharacteristically lazy right now so I didn’t. Can any current or former U.S. military members who read this clue me in here??

I thought members of our military were prohibited from talking about specific missions for a certain period of time; for some reason I do not know, 25 years is what I’m thinking.

I especially thought special forces, like Navy SEALs, had to keep their traps shut about missions. Apparently that’s not the case.

One of the members of SEAL Team 6, who killed Obama’s Saddam Hussein Osama Usama bin Laden the dude who orchestrated the attacks on September 11th of 2001 has a book coming out.

Is this the guy? Why is he pictured???

How is it possible that he can write about that mission only 16 months after it happened? And why is he doing TV interviews?

The Obama Administration is Doing Shit that’s Scary as Hell!!!

I’ve no clue what to make of the following. I’m just putting it out there; and it confuses me. If you are more schooled in this stuff than I am, please clue me in so I can set the record straight.

I know nothing about bullets, except from what I learned watching Rambo, but over the last several months the Department of Homeland Security has executed requests for upwards of a billion rounds of hollow point bullets… for training purposes. Why do they need hollow point bullets for training purposes?

Hollow point bullets are designed to expand as they enter the body, causing maximum damage by tearing apart internal organs.

Perhaps I sort of understand the purchase, since the Department of Homeland Security is border patrol…. even though the current administration is all about illegal immigrants and is, in fact, signing up illegals as voters as we speak. Again, the order noted the ammunition was for training…

But then it gets really weird…

The National Weather Service wants some too! Why the fuck would the National Weather Service buy 46,000 rounds of hollow point bullets? They need to figure out the weather; but why a need for bullets?

And then there’s this…

The Social Security Administration has requested 174,000 rounds of hollow point bullets. What does this agency need ammunition for??

Earlier this year the Department of Homeland Security ran a drill called Operation Shield which included turning the entrance of a Florida Social Security office into a checkpoint manned by Federal Protective Service officers armed with semiautomatic rifles.

That’s just creepy…

The Department of Homeland Security recently put out an order for riot gear in preparation for the upcoming DNC, RNC and presidential inauguration. The U.S. Army is also busy buying similar equipment.

Is this election going to get that ugly?

Why are the National Weather Service and Social Security Administration purchasing ammunition?

Is the government preparing to clamp down on some major civil unrest?

I’m Way Late on this One ~ But Obama is a Terrible President

For starters, none of the commentary in this post was coordinated with or approved by the management of the company I work for. This is all, as usual, me talking.

I was gonna comment on this a couple weeks ago, but got sidetracked and forgot about it. As Barack’s misleading campaign commercials continue to piss me off, this issue came back into focus…

On July 13th, President (and I use that term loosely) Obama gave a speech in Roanoke, Virginia in which he basically attacked small business owners, told them they didn’t build their businesses without government help and said they need to pay even more taxes. The transcript of his remarks is on the White House website, HERE. I cut out the first 4,000 words in which he sucked off his followers.

What follows is the part where he lambasted business owners… in context. Everything I cut out was Obama fluff… Again, click the link above to read the entire text. But you won’t… especially if you’re a lazy liberal who only does what your told and can’t think on your own…

My comments are bold and not in italics.

THE PRESIDENT:  Well, first of all, like I said, the only way you can pay for that — if you’re actually saying you’re bringing down the deficit — is to cut transportation, cut education, cut basic research, voucherize Medicare, and you’re still going to end up having to raise taxes on middle-class families to pay for this $5 trillion tax cut.  That’s not a deficit reduction plan.  That’s a deficit expansion plan. 

     I’ve got a different idea.  I do believe we can cut — we’ve already made a trillion dollars’ worth of cuts.  We can make some more cuts in programs that don’t work, and make government work more efficiently.  (Applause.)  Not every government program works the way it’s supposed to. What government programs are you gonna cut? You already used the scare tactic words transportation, education, research and Medicare. Nobody is gonna cut those…. but what do YOU propose? And frankly, government can’t solve every problem.  If somebody doesn’t want to be helped, government can’t always help them.  Parents — we can put more money into schools, but if your kids don’t want to learn it’s hard to teach them.  (Applause.) BOOOO! You douche!

This video starts with the following text and continues through the end…Watch it, libs, it’s unedited.

But you know what, I’m not going to see us gut the investments that grow our economy to give tax breaks to me or Mr. Romney or folks who don’t need them.  So I’m going to reduce the deficit in a balanced way.  We’ve already made a trillion dollars’ worth of cuts.  We can make another trillion or trillion-two, and what we then do is ask for the wealthy to pay a little bit more.  (Applause.)  And, by the way, we’ve tried that before — a guy named Bill Clinton did it.  We created 23 million new jobs, turned a deficit into a surplus, and rich people did just fine.  We created a lot of millionaires.

BULLSHIT is right…. The government doesn’t create millionaires…at least not in the private sector… 

     There are a lot of wealthy, successful Americans who agree with me — because they want to give something back.  They know they didn’t — look, if you’ve been successful, you didn’t get there on your own.  You didn’t get there on your own.  I’m always struck by people who think, well, it must be because I was just so smart.  There are a lot of smart people out there.  It must be because I worked harder than everybody else.  Let me tell you something — there are a whole bunch of hardworking people out there.  (Applause.)

If you were successful, somebody along the line gave you some help.  There was a great teacher somewhere in your life.  Somebody helped to create this unbelievable American system that we have that allowed you to thrive.  Somebody invested in roads and bridges.  If you’ve got a business — you didn’t build that.  Somebody else made that happen. 

I’ve gotta cut in right here, because this is where Obama really screwed up. He said, “If you’ve got a business, you didn’t build that. Someone else made that happen.” How so, you idiot?

I work for a company that was started by one man who had a vision back in 1985. Maybe he had a teacher that inspired him. I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a government funded public school, however.

In short, dude had an idea to write a software program that would allow construction companies to better manage their finances and, ultimately, become more profitable and efficient in their day to day processes. 

Initially, he was R&D, sales and support. He grew the company enough to hire a programmer, who is still with us today. Ronald Reagan and his administration had nothing to do with any of this… Obama would like you to think the government helped, though…

Today, our company now has upwards of three thousand construction companies using our program, operating efficiently and profitably from here on out. 

I’m not putting the rest of the Obama comments on here… he’s a jackass and I’d prefer to put something on here that I like, which is women…. Like I said before, liberals, click on the link above to read the full text of his silly speech. I know you won’t read it, though! For those of you who are patient…. here is former porn star Bibi Jones.

She keeps sending me pictures like this…. GO! Go away!

 Hug your children and love them every day

Dear Ted Nugent, You are Crazy! I Will no Longer Call you Uncle Ted.

Anyone who knows me knows that I’m not a fan of President Obama. I’ve needled him on here before… just poking fun, of course.

The fact of the matter, however, is that Obama is the President of the United States. He should be respected (boy was that hard to type). He certainly should never be publicly disrespected, in my opinion.

Along comes Ted Nugent.

Ummm... Yeah.

I’ve always been a huge fan of Mr. Nugent’s music. He opened for one of the KISS shows I went to and absolutely kicked ass! I’ve also been a fan of Ted in a political sense; primarily because of his defense of the Second Amendment and his work with the NRA.

Oftentimes, though, I’ll hear a Ted Nugent soundbite (not the musical ones) and just cringe at his abrasiveness. It’s one thing to have a message (I agree with a lot of his message) and work hard to keep that message in front of people. It’s a whole other deal to call people names or make crazy analogies implying harm to those people.

Case in point. Ted Nugent was at the NRA Annual Meeting last week and, ultimately, crossed the line in my opinion. The following video is chopped up a bit, but illustrates my point.

He called the current administration “vile,” “evil” and “America-hating.” C’mon man…. you’re getting crazy there. They don’t hate America!

But it gets better:

Our President and Attorney General, Vice President, Hillary Clinton, they’re criminals, they’re criminals.

Criminals? Maybe not the smartest bunch, but criminals? No… Biden’s a bumbling goofball and Hillary is gross looking, but they’re not criminals.

It isn’t the enemy who ruined America. It’s good people who bent over and let the enemy in.

The enemy? They’re not the enemy, Ted. And good people ruined America? You make no sense.

If the coyote’s in your living room pissing on your couch, it’s not the coyote’s fault. It’s your fault for not shooting him.

JESUS…. How did this go from being about an enemy to being about a coyote pissing on my couch? I don’t think coyotes are any type of enemy; unless you’re a rabbit. Is this some sort of twisted analogy, Ted?  Are Obama, Holder and Clinton now coyotes? And should I be shooting them… or the coyote? Either way, that’s not nice, Ted. If you are only rambling about a coyote peeing on my couch, how did it get in my living room? Are you implying I don’t know how to shut the door? I, personally, wouldn’t shoot the coyote because I think coyotes are pretty cool; and cute…

I would, however, be concerned about my dog. He doesn’t play well with other dogs.

Ted continues to puke:

We’re Americans because we defied the king. We didn’t negotiate or compromise with the king. We defied the emperors. We are patriots. We are Braveheart!

Ted… The aforementioned politicians are Americans too. So are the coyotes. But Braveheart? That’s a movie, Ted; a movie that features Mel Gibson!

Holy shit… I wouldn’t be making Mel Gibson references, man! He’s about as crazy as you!

We need to ride into that battlefield and chop their heads off in November. Any questions?

Damn skippy I have questions, Ted! I thought we voted in November; but you’re talking about choppin’ off heads? Chop whose heads off? The coyote’s? Obama’s? I guarantee ya, when the Secret Service isn’t ripping off hard working hookers, they’re protecting Obama.. so I’m not going after him! Also, I thought I had a gun in this nightmare! Ohhhh… we’re pretending to be Braveheart now and using big ass swords? Does the NRA support sword wielding  and provide the appropriate training for said sword-ery?

At some point, my former “Uncle Ted” said this:

If Barack Obama becomes the president in November, again, I will either be dead or in jail by this time next year.

What the hell does that mean? What you gonna do to be dead or in jail? NO WONDER THE HOOKER HAPPY SECRET SERVICE HAD TO CHECK YOU OUT.

Don’t get me wrong here… I’m not blasting the NRA. The NRA is a good and necessary organization.

But you, Mr. Nugent, say the wrong things and for that I disown you. Idiot!

This is all you’re good for:

Barack Obama is Pro-Bush! With a side of Tool!

Derp, derp, derp!

The primary objective of Barack Obama’s American Recovery and Reinvestment Act of 2009, or ARRA, was to save and create jobs almost immediately. Secondary objectives were to provide temporary relief programs for those most impacted by the recession and invest in infrastructure, education, health, and ‘green’ energy.

I’ll get into the failed ‘green’ energy initiatives here later, because they are doozies!

Now… I’m well aware that President Obama didn’t personally approve how stimulus funds were allocated. I would LOVE to know who all approved this shit!

From cnsnews.com. Holy shit!

The government spent at least $205,075 in 2010 to “translocate” a single bush that stood in the path of a $1.045-billion highway-renovation project that was partially funded by the economic stimulus legislation President Barack Obama signed in 2009.

205 grand to move a bush???

“In October 2009, an ecologist identified a plant growing in a concrete-bound median strip along Doyle Drive in the Presidio as Arctostaphylos franciscana,” the U.S. Department of Interior reported in the Aug. 10, 2010 edition of the Federal Register. “The plant’s location was directly in the footprint of a roadway improvement project designed to upgrade the seismic and structural integrity of the south access to the Golden Gate Bridge.

Ohhhhh! It’s a California project! That explains everything! Those liberal wackos are more into the welfare of plants and animals than they are their own people.

The bush—a Franciscan manzanita—was a specimen of a commercially cultivated species of shrub that can be purchased from nurseries for as little as $15.98 per plant. The particular plant in question, however, was discovered in the midst of the City of San Francisco, in the median strip of a highway, and was deemed to be the last example of the species in the “wild.”

So you can buy these things at The Home Depot, but the local government spends a ton of cash to relocate a wild plant?

Prior to the discovery of this “wild” Franciscan manzanita, the plant had been considered extinct for as long as 62 years–extinct, that is, outside of people’s yards and botanical gardens.

Holy crap is this shit hilarious!

On Oct. 16, 2009, Dr. Daniel Gluesenkamp, a botanist who was then the director of Habitat Protection and Restoration for Audubon Canyon Ranch, noticed the manzanita when he was driving along Doyle Drive (the highway leading to the Golden Gate Bride that is now under renovation).

With help from a biologist from the Presidio Trust (which oversees the Presidio) and an ecologist from the National Park Service, Gluesenkamp’s discovery was determined to be a Franciscan manzanita.

Shortly thereafter, the Presidio Trust, the California Department of Transportation (Caltrans), the National Park Service, the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service, and the California Department of Fish and Game developed a Memorandum of Agreement (MOA) for saving this one bush from the highway project, for which ground had been broken in December 2009.

This has been known for years…. but, man, is our government fucked up! This many government agencies working together to save a bush… Makes me sick!

The agreement of Dec. 21, 2009 – Memorandum of Agreement Regarding Planning, Development, and Implementation of the Conservation Plan for Franciscan Manzanita – explains how, why, and when the bush would be moved and which agencies would be responsible for which aspects of the move. (MOA – Fran Man – 2009.pdf)

Seriously???? For a bush? I double checked; this is not a joke… this really happened!

While the MOA did not detail all the costs for moving the bush, it did state that in addition to funding removal and transportation of the Franciscan manzanita, Caltrans agreed to transfer $79,470 to the Presidio Trust “to fund the establishment, nurturing, and monitoring of the Mother Plant in its new location for a period not to exceed ten (10) years following relocation and two (2) years for salvaged rooted layers and cuttings according to the activities outlined in the Conservation Plan.”

So, California is broke as hell. Right? And they drop $80k to take care of a bush for 10 years? I could take care of my three children for ten years with $80k!

Furthermore, Presidio Parkway Project spokesperson Molly Graham told CNSNews.com that the “hard removal”— actually digging up the plant, putting it on a truck, driving it somewhere else and replanting it–cost $100,000.

The MOA also stated that Caltrans agreed to “Transfer $25,605.00 to the Trust to fund the costs of reporting requirements of the initial 10-year period as outlined in the Conservation Plan.”

Exactly what is there to report?? It’s a plant. “I watered it today and it’s green.”

The $100,000 to pay for the “hard removal,” the $79,470 to pay for the “establishment, nurturing and monitoring” of the plant for a decade after its “hard removal,” and the $25,605 to cover the “reporting requirements” for the decade after the “hard removal,” equaled a total cost of $205,075 for “translocating” this manzanita bush.

There ya go people! Your tax dollars at work! There are other, ongoing, costs involved with this “project” but I’m not going to get into them. Click on the link to the article above to read it all.

But there is one other thing to note here that sheds some light on who had their hands in this particular cookie jar:

In a Feb. 17, 2010 statement about stimulus money going to the project, then-House Speaker Nancy Pelosi described herself as “a long-time supporter of the Presidio Parkway project.”


Thinking about California and the idiocy of its government reminds me of an awesome video and even better song, titled “Ænima”, performed by Tool. Enjoy the darkness that is this fantastic song!