Tag Archives: Indianapolis Colts

Monday Moanin’ ~ Colts 25 @ Browns 24… Week Two of the Potential Hoyer Benching.

Hoyer Colts

The Browns offense blew yet another game and it’s yet another week in which QB1 Brian Hoyer might lose his job.


Because apparently the QB must make ALL the plays and drag the team to a win according to the media and the stupid Browns fans…

Our defense was freakin’ awesome yesterday; held Colts QB Andrew Luck to his worst game of the season. We picked him off twice, forced him to fumble and sacked him 3 times for 25 yards. That defense scored 14 of our 24 points. Yeah, they gave up the final Colts drive that won the game but I ain’t hanging anything on the defense

Special teams was alright. The return game was average and the coverage game did a pretty good job.

K Billy Cundiff needs to be replaced this week. He sucks. No wonder the Ravens cut him. Dude missed another field goalad it was like is fifth in five games.

Like I said, the offense blew this one. Everyone wants to bench Hoyer and put in Johnny Jackass.


Hoyer’s stat line was horrible. He was 14/31 for 140 yards, no TDs and 2 picks. If ya take the time to really look at Hoyer’s performance, you’ll see that he did what he could with what he has.

I re-watched the game tonight and put all 34 of Hoyer’s dropbacks under a microscope. A quick summary:

Three times the offensive line broke down and Hoyer was forced to scramble.

Of the 17 times Hoyer missed while passing:

WRs recorded 5 drops, three of which were on critical 3rd downs.

2 times routes were half assed or ran incorrectly, once leading to an interception and the other preventing a 1st down.

There WERE three times where Hoyer truly fucked up.

Check it out for yourself. I color coded it for easy reading. If the text is blue, it means the offense or coaches messed up. If it’s red it means Hoyer blew it!

First half…

First Possession

  1. 1st and 10 – Completed screen pass to WR Josh Gordon for 9 yards.
  2. 2nd and 10 – Sacked. TE Jordan Cameron gets beat on block. Nobody open.
  3. 3rd and 7 – Incomplete pass to WR Josh Gordon who gave up on his route across the middle.


Second Possession

  1. 2nd and 15 after Joe Thomas false start penalty – 6 yard pass over the middle to WR Josh Gordon with Indy LB about to blast him.
  2. 3rd and 4 – Incomplete pass too high over middle to WR Andrew Hawkins. I thought he was throwing it away because everyone was covered.


Third Possession

  1. 2nd and 10 – Complete pass deep left to TE Jordan Cameron for 20 yards.
  2. 2nd and 6 – Intercepted in end zone. TE Jordan Cameron said he ran the wrong route.

Fourth Possession

  1. 3rd and 6 – Incomplete short left to WR Taylor Gabriel. Offensive line collapsed, Hoyer scrambled out of a sack and threw it away.


Fifth Possession

  1. 1st and 10 – Incomplete short left to TE Jim Dray, who dropped the ball.
  2. 3rd and 4 – Incomplete short left to WR Travis Benjamin. Hoyer didn’t have his feet set and the throw was off.


Sixth Possession

  1. 3rd and 5 – Complete pass short right to TE Jordan Cameron for 10 yards
  2. 2nd and 9 – Incomplete short right to WR Andrew Hawkins. Offensive line broke down and Hoyer was hit as he threw.
  3. 3rd and 9 – Incomplete short left to WR Travis Benjamin. Well placed ball bounced right off Benjamin’s chest.

K Billy Cundiff misses a 40 yard Field Goal… Woulda been up 10-0 had he made it.

Seventh Possession

  1.  1st and 10 – Complete pass short right to TE Jordan Cameron for 3 yards.
  2. 2nd and 7 – Incomplete deep middle to WR Taylor Gabriel. This one is on Hoyer. Clean pocket, no pressure and overthrew by almost 10 yards. Woulda been a TD had it been on the money and was caught. Browns “fans” begin booing.
  3. 3rd and 7 – Complete pass deep middle to WR Travis Benjamin for 27 yards. Nice pass under pressure and redemption!
  4. 3rd and 8 – Complete pass short right to WR Andrew Hawkins for 12 yards.
  5. 1st and 10 – Complete screen pass short left to Taylor Gabriel for 12 yards

Isaiah Crowell 9 yard TD run!! We’re up 14-7!

Second half…

Eighth Possession

  1.  1st and 15 after false start penalty on RT Mitchell Schwartz – Incomplete short left to WR Josh Gordon. Well placed ball bounced right off his hands.
  2. 3rd and 12 – Offensive line breaks down and everyone is covered downfield. Hoyer scrambles for 4 yards.


Ninth Possession

  1. 3rd and 7 – Incomplete short right to WR Travis Benjamin. Right on the money but the defender knocked it out.


Tenth Possession

  1. 1st and 10 – Incomplete deep right to WR Josh Gordon. This is a tough one. Hoyer just barely overthrew Gordon but Gordon didn’t put a ton of effort into going for the ball. We’ll blame Hoyer, though, ’cause he coulda put some touch on that pass.
  2. 2nd and 10 – Complete screen pass  right to WR Taylor Gabriel for 4 yards.
  3. 3rd and 6 – Complete pass short left to WR Andrew Hawkins for 3 yards. Poor play calling on this and the previous play.


Eleventh Possession

  1. 2nd and 7 – Complete pass to TE Jordan Cameron for 8 yards.
  2. 2nd and 7 – Complete pass to TE Jim Dray for 3 yards.
  3. 3rd and 4 – Incomplete pass short right to TE Jordan Cameron. Hoyer was a bit off target, but Cameron was interfered with and there was no flag.


Twelfth Possession

  1. 2nd and 11 – Complete pass short left to WR Andrew Hawkins for 3 yards.
  2. 3rd and 8 – Incomplete pass short right to WR Andrew Hawkins who was totally mugged on the play and there shoulda been a pass interference call. The ball still bounced off Hawkins’ arm.

Cundiff with a 39 yard field goal. We’re up 24-19 at this point.

Thirteenth Possession

  1. 2nd and 8 – Complete deep pass to WR Andrew Hawkins for 20 yards.
  2. 3rd and 7 – Hoyer throws a strike to WR Josh Gordon that initially appears to be a 14 yard 1st down. Nope. Gordon didn’t pull the ball in and it hit the ground. The play was challenged and overturned as an incomplete pass.


Indy goes on and puts together an 11 play, 90 yard TD drive to make the score 25-24 after a failed 2 point conversion. Cleveland has 32 seconds to do something.

Final possession

  1. 1st and 10 – Incomplete deep left to WR Josh Gordon. Had Gordon caught it we woulda had the ball at the Colts 28 yardline, but it went right through his hands.
  2. 2nd and 10 – Incomplete across the middle to WR Andrew Hawkins… was damn near picked off. Hoyer got hit after the play so we got 15 yards and a first down off a roughing the passer penalty.
  3. 1st and 10 – Hoyer throws a pick. WR Travis Benjamin was knocked down by a defender on the play, but there was no flag.

Ball game…

I really don’t care if Hoyer or Manziel is starting, I just want to win! Problem is, I believe the Browns are gonna give up on this season (yeah, a playoff berth would require the planets to align) and stick Manziel in to “see what he can do.”

I don’t like that mentality, because it means they’ve given up on this year while there’s still a slim chance to make the playoffs.

I don’t know what Manziel can do, because we haven’t seen any of him in the NFL other than a lucky garbage time TD drive against the Bills last week.

I know what he can’t do… He can’t read a playbook because he didn’t have one in school. They merely flashed him pictures that designated plays. He can’t call plays in the huddle either.

If the Browns decide to start Manziel for the next three games they will have totally given up on this season and will need to strip down their offense to fit in that degenerate.

Be smart Browns! Keep Hoyer in!

Already Freakin’ Out about Tomorrow ~ Colts @ Browns!

Cleveland Browns v Buffalo Bills

I hate being wrong!

After the Browns offense (NOTE: I said OFFENSE; not blaming any one player here) stunk it up against the Bills last week and owner Jimmy Haslam coach Pettine benched QB1 Brian Hoyer for Ryan Leaf Johnny Manziel, I incorrectly ASSumed that Hoyer was done for the season.

Boy am I glad I was wrong this time!

On Wednesday, the Browns announced that Hoyer is starting tomorrow against the Indianapolis Colts.

This is a good decision. The team HAD to stick with the guy that got them to 7-5!

I know I’m beating a dead horse here but whatever… this offense has more issues than just at QB.

  1. We lost Pro Bowl C Alex Mack in week 6. That has directly affected both pass and run blocking.
  2. We lost Pro Bowl TE Jordan Cameron in week 7. That throws the passing game off. TEs Barnidge and Dray have filled in respectably, but Barnidge is now out with a rib injury.
  3. Pro Bowl WR Josh Gordon returned from a 10 game pot smoking suspension a couple weeks ago and still isn’t on the same page with the rest of the offense.

99% of Browns fans are pretty stupid and don’t realize how much those three issues can handcuff an offense.

All those fools jerked off in unison when Manziel took the field. They wanted to see what he could do against a Bills defense that hadn’t gameplanned for him and  whose team was up 20-3 with 12 minutes left in the game.

Manziel’s stats? 5 of 8 passing for 63 yards, 2 rushes for 13 yards and a TD. I will say this (Shhhh… don’t tell anyone): Manziel’s first drive looked pretty okay. In 3:14 he carried the Browns 80 yards in 8 plays for a TD. Dude rolls out incredibly fast and gets rid of the ball somewhat quickly.

He’s a dumbass, though.

He threw a pass into coverage to TE Jim Dray that was damn near deflected/intercepted, but caught, and all the Manziel sheep thought it was awesome. It wasn’t. Here’s a still shot of right before hew threw (click to embiggen)…


… RB Terrance West has his left hand up because he’s open… big time! If ya watch the play in real time, Manziel is totally locked on to Dray the entire time and doesn’t even see West come free off his block. There wasn’t a Bills defender within 10 yards of West; woulda been a nice TD.

Fortunately, 2 plays later Johnny Fuckface scrambled for a 10 yard TD.

UNfortunately, the idiot dove head first, white Michael Vick style, into the endzone; got hit by one of the Bills on the way in. Then he did that God awful money sign shit to celebrate…. you don’t celebrate like that when your team is losing asshole!

Manziel will never finish a complete game running like that.

On his second drive he went 4 plays for 9 yards and turned the ball over on downs. He actually got hit and fumbled on third down but the NFL wants to see Manziel succeed no matter what officials reversed the fumble call and said it was an incomplete pass. It was a fumble.

Don’t get me wrong folks, I wanna see the Browns win and get into the playoffs. I couldn’t care less who’s playing QB when that happens. Manziel ain’t the one, though.

Contrary to any excitement expressed by Browns players about Manziel providing a “spark” in last week’s loss, tiny WR Travis Benjamin had this to say about the nitwit:

We just figure, as receivers, we have to work more. If Johnny comes in the huddle and he pronounces the play wrong, we’ve got to make sure we correct it. We’ve got to make sure we correct him. Offensive linemen, tight ends, all the receivers, all the running backs, we’ve just got to make sure we’ve got to be in form when he’s in the game

Case. Closed. Manziel can’t call a freakin’ play! Hoyer’s the one!

So what about tomorrow? Shit… This might be our toughest game this year.

Colts QB Andrew Luck might be a dork but, damn, he sure can play football! He plays like Pittsburgh’s Ben Roethlisberger, except he’s faster, has a fully functioning brain and he’s never raped any women.

The Browns defense needs to pressure Luck all damn game! That dude gets too comfy and he’s  gonna throw for 400+ yards on us!

Colts RB Trent Richardson, who the Browns traded away a couple years ago, implied that he’s gonna run all over us ’cause we didn’t believe in him. He averages like 36 yards a game. Shut his ass down and don’t let him break some NFL record tomorrow.

Also look forward to other ex-Browns to try to beat us up tomorrow. Joshua Cribbs, D’Qwell Jackson and Mike Adams hope to make some sorta statement.

Just don’t let ’em Browns!

Hey Coach Pettine, if you’re reading this, how about we see some no huddle/hurry up offense tomorrow? That shit works; it’s not used nearly as often enough!

Tomorrow’s game is a must win if we’re gonna keep our playoff hopes alive.


A Look Back on Wild Card Weekend…

I started writing a post Saturday, before the NFL playoff games started, but ran short on time and relegated it to the trash… I reincarnated it to pull out some good background material even for this post, namely how the playoffs work.. Here’s what I wrote Saturday…

It’s Wild Card Weekend ~ All NFL Games Should be Good from Here on Out!

NFL Logo

Right? God I hope so! I’ve watched sixteen weeks of somewhat shitty football watching Browns games. I’m hoping all the games from today until Super Bowl XLVII (Let’s just drop the Roman numerals already and call it 47, alright?) are fun to watch!

There are twelve teams in play now. Here’s a quick look at how the NFL playoffs work…

There are two conferences in the NFL; the American Football Conference (AFC) and the National Football Conference (NFC). Each conference is comprised of four divisions; North, South, East and West. Each division has four teams. That makes 32 teams. 20, including my beloved Browns every year, don’t make the postseason.

This weekend is known as Wild Card Weekend. The top two teams in each conference earn a bye, meaning they don’t have to play this weekend because they’re the best of the best! This includes the Broncos and Patriots for the AFC and the Falcons and 49ers of the NFC.

The remaining 8 teams are the aforementioned wildcards who play this weekend. That includes the Texans, Ravens, Colts and Bengals of the AFC and the Packers, Redskins, Seahawks and Vikings of the NFC.

I’m just gonna focus on today’s games because it’s like 10 minutes until kickoff…

…. and that’s where I ran out of time and scrapped the post. So now I’ll just look back on this weekend’s games.

Saturday’s early game was the Cincinnati Bengals at the Houston Texans. Prior to the game I had Cincy winning it 24-17. Boy was I wrong…

Houston’s defense was more than the Bengals could handle. I’m really starting to like this J.J. Watt dude, defensive end for the Texans. After swatting down an Andy Dalton pass, he did this…

JJ Watt No no

…. and cracked me up! He’s a fantastic ball player and a funny guy!

The Bengals only TD came on an interception returned by Leon Hall. Their other two scores were FGs.

Oh… don’t think the Texans were some kind of offensive powerhouse. The only powerhouse was their RB Arian Foster who ran for 140 yards and a TD. The rest of their scoring was 4 FGs by ex-Bengal Shayne Graham.

The 19-13 win advanced the Texans. Next Sunday they play the Patriots, who I’m sure will crush them.

As I’m writing this, I had The Biggest Loser on in the background and I kept hearing (and watching) Jillian Michaels…

Jillian Michaels Bikini

…. and she threw off my concentration, so I switched over to the GoDaddy.com Bowl featuring Kent State at Arkansas State. GO FLASHES!

Anyway, Saturday’s late game was the Minnesota Vikings at the Green Bay Packers. I was pulling for the Vikes because I love me some Adrian Peterson! Didn’t work out to well for them, though…

The Packers were hitting on all cylinders and Minnesota didn’t have much of a chance. From a defensive standpoint, they had the right gameplan. Here’s what CB Charles Woodson had to say:

No disrespect to Ponder, but … it’s about one guy and that’s Adrian Peterson. Our main focus, whether it was Ponder or Webb, was to keep 28 (Peterson) from getting off. And if we were going to keep him from getting off, put the ball in the quarterback’s hands, whatever quarterback it was, we felt good about what was going to happen.

He was referring to Christian Ponder, the Vikes starting QB, who didn’t start. In his place was Colt McCoy Joe Webb, who was horrendous.

Joe Webb

And Green Bay’s QB Aaron Rodgers has so many freakin’ weapons at his disposal it makes me sick! DuJuan Harris, James Jones, Tom Crabtree, Greg Jennings John Kuhn and Jordy Nelson.

Anyway, Green Bay went on to win 24-10… and it wasn’t even that close because Webb threw a TD for the Vikings in garbage time… The Packers play the 49ers Saturday night. I expect it to be a good game…

So yesterday…. as much as I dislike the Colts and as much as I hate the Ravens, I gave the Ravens my blessing over the Colts in the early game, as I figured they’d win it.

I was right. Colts QB Andrew Luck looked like a rookie in his first playoff game. Nothing against Luck… hell, he was playing against the Ravens D. Even the great QBs, like Cleveland’s Brandon Weeden, struggle against Baltimore’s defense!

Baltimore’s Joe Flacco only completed 12 passes… but for 282 yards! God that dude bugs me! He wants to be mentioned in the same breath as Manning and Brady, but most of the time he’s a pedestrian QB at best. Anquan Boldin made Flacco the man yesterday. But, as they say, Flacco wins games…

The pregame/postgame stuff featuring Ray Lewis, because of his impending retirement, was actually quite touching…

Ray Lewis

… Much respect! The dude is still a beast at 37 years old and a genius running that defense. I am so happy his God spewing ass is gone hate to see him go.

Baltimore handily defeated the Colts 24-9. Next week won’t be so easy, when they go to Denver. Peyton Manning will make that defense his bitch.

In the late game yesterday, the Seahawks played the Redskins on what appeared to be some field somewhere in Iraq, though it turned out to be FedEx Field. I don’t understand how an NFL owner could have such a shitty field in his stadium, especially in the playoffs!

The Redskins started off strong while the ‘Hawks sputtered to get going. After a pretty quick 14-0 lead, RGIII’s leg fell off the wheels fell off the wagon for Washington. Actually, RGIII became slower and slower. Dude was clearly hurt, but his stupid coach left him in the game…

At the same time, Seattle’s QB Russell Wilson got hot and gashed the Redskins D; running and passing. The tandem of Russell Wilson and RB Marshawn Lynch are incredibly dangerous.

What seems to be the defining moment of the game, though it was halfway through the 4th quarter and Seattle had scored 21 unanswered points to put them ahead 21-14, was when RGIII’s knee actually did fall apart…


… Shame on Mike Shanahan for keeping RGIII in the game after he was clearly hurting early in the game. He didn’t get up after his knee bent like that.

Right now, they’re saying he has partial tears in both his ACL and LCL. I assume he’s gonna need surgery, when he might not have had he been pulled earlier in the game.

Seattle won the game 24-14 and now plays the Falcons next Sunday. I think Seattle has a shot, but we shall see!

For now, FUCK YOU Mike Shanahan for hurting your franchise QB as much as you did….

Now it’s time to watch Alabama beat down Notre Dame!


Already Freakin’ Out about Today ~ Week Seven ~ Browns @ Colts

Holy shit… we’re playing the powerhouse Indianapolis Colts. Their QB, Andrew Luck, was picked #1 by Indy in April. Everyone on ESPN says he’s the next Peyton Manning. We don’t stand a chance!

Wait… the Colts are 2-3? That’s no powerhouse! Yeah, they beat Minnesota and Green Bay… but by an average of 3 points. Their losses, however, average a 15 point deficit!

My our Brownies average 10 points in their wins! Our losses average a 7.8 point deficit!

Know what that means? We lose about half as bad as Indy does! Seriously, to me, it means we have a better defense!

Forget about all those numbers… What’s up with this Andrew Luck doofus? Is he Peyton Manning?

Nope. Not yet at least! Let’s compare Luck’s numbers to Brandon Weeden’s thus far…

Luck 118 221 53.4 1488 6.73 41 7 7 72
BW3 129 231 55.8 1519 6.58 71 7 10 68.1

They’re very similar QB’s, actually. As far as league rankings go, Luck is 30th and Weeden’s dead last based on QB rating. Technically, they BOTH suck! Yet ESPN talks like Luck is the second coming of Peyton Manning and Weeden is a bust…

Weeden doesn’t suck though. He’s the best QB we’ve had since the Browns came back in ’99! If you take out his historically bad performance against Philly in week one, I think he goes from dead last to mid pack.

I really have no concerns today.

Ok… I’m a bit upset that Browns RB Trent Richardson has bruised ribs and could potentially be limited against one of the worst run defenses in the league. Check it out… he’ll be wearing a flak jacket today so should be safe if anyone tries to shoot him!

If Trent gets gunned down, RB Montario Hardesty was pretty good last week and he could be tough today. OKAY! There’s a concern… Hardesty fumbles… Ugh! Don’t do it today, buddy!

I’ve got way more faith in our WRs than I had early in the season. Josh Gordon is lookin’ like he might be the real deal… Josh Cooper has sure hands and should be playing today. YAY for white WRs!

I’m so confident I’m calling this one! Cleveland 34 ~ Indy 13.

GO BROWNS! Let’s continue the road to the playoffs today!

Hug your children and love them every day